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There's a lot of misinformation circulating about being single. Many times, people have expectations of what it's like; and instead of finding out how things really are, they impose their expectations on you. So what can you do to clear up any misperceptions? Look to the example of Paul.

He was unfairly imprisoned, but rather than whine away his time, he got in contact with people who cared. He did things for those people who honored God. One of these "doings" was his letter to the Philippians.

Not everything was happy for Paul. He faced the very real possibility of being put to death (1:23-25). But despite his tough circumstances, Paul persisted in helping others. If you feel imprisoned by a preconception that says everyone gets married—or ought to—remember, as a Christian, you are a whole person fully capable of caring in Jesus' name, whether married or single. Respond to your struggle with four actions:

1. Find reasons to be glad (1:12-18).
2. Let God enable you to choose honorable actions. Refuse premarital affairs and other temptations that sprout from loneliness (1:19, 20).
3. Address your struggles directly (1:21-26).
4. Talk to and treat people in ways that bring attention to God. Be so caring that people will understand God's love simply by being around you (1:27-30). (See also Psalm 23; Isaiah 40:21-31.)

I know that this will turn out for my deliverance through your prayer and the supply of the Spirit of Jesus Christ, according to my earnest expectation and hope that in nothing I shall be ashamed, but with all boldness, as always, so now also Christ will be magnified in my body, whether by life or by death. Philippians 1:19, 20

Do you bury your struggles or address them directly with the help of God and your friends?

Copyright 2001 by the author or Christianity Today International/Christian Bible Studies.

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