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Augustine’s mother, Monica, has to rank as one of the most well-known matriarchs in Christendom’s history. She lived with her husband, Patricius, whom Augustine describes as a “poor free man” and a minor official in the North African town of Thagaste. Patricius was a pagan, worshiping the Punic gods of the region, but Monica was a devout Christian. However, her name is derived from that of a Punic god, Mon, so we might guess that she came from a pagan family and was a convert to Christianity.
Monica bore two sons and probably several daughters. She suffered through Augustine’s growing pains, relentless in her determination to see that “the son of so many tears” would become a good Christian. She always clung to her belief—encouraged by a dream—that before she died she would see Augustine convert to Christianity.
When he took his professorship in Milan, Monica joined him there and set about finding him a high-society wife. In Milan, she attended the church of Bishop Ambrose; she may have seen in Ambrose a model of what Augustine could become—a successful politician-turned-churchman. Monica was overjoyed when Augustine told her of his conversion—it was quite literally a “dream come true.” After his conversion, she seems to have managed the retreat house that Augustine set up in Cassiciacum with his close friends.
On their return to North Africa, Augustine and Monica and the friends with them were waylaid in Ostia. While there, Augustine relates, he and Monica shared a “vision of eternal wisdom,” a foretaste of the life to come. Nine days later she died. Augustine and his brother buried her in Ostia; recently a fragment of her burial inscription was found there.

Augustine’s closest and most enduring friendship was with Alypius. Son of a leading family in Thagaste, Alypius was younger than Augustine, and was a student of his in Thagaste and in Carthage. Alypius moved to Rome shortly before Augustine did, and later the two were together in Milan.
Augustine credits Alypius for his decision not to marry. Alypius had an “innate love of virtue,” and admired the Manichees for their chastity. He followed Augustine into Manichacism and later to Christianity. Alypius was present in the garden of Milan at Augustine’s conversion, accompanied him on his post-conversion retreat to Cassiciacum, and was baptized by Ambrose along with Augustine and Augustine’s son.
Vignettes of Alypius appear often in Augustine’s Confessions, attesting to a genuinely close friendship. A lawyer by trade, Alypius later became the bishop of Thagaste. Solemn, courteous and obstinate, he has been described as Augustine’s “alter ego.”

Two important people in Augustine’s life remain largely unknown to us: his concubine and his son.
Around the time of his father’s death, Augustine took himself a concubine—a common and accepted arrangement in that day. For at least 14 years the two lived together, and parented a son they named Adeodatus. But when Monica joined Augustine in Milan, she had plans for a career-advancing marriage for her son, so she insisted that he send his concubine away. So she went back to Africa, leaving Adeodatus with Augustine and Monica.
She vowed as she left “never to give herself to another man.” Augustine must have loved her; he speaks of their mutual love, and the sad separation when she was “torn from my side.” But he never reveals her name.
Adeodatus remained with his father, and was baptized with him on Easter of 387. Augustine reports that his son’s talent was a source of awe to him, and once wrote Adeodatus that “you are the only man of all men that I would wish to surpass me in all things.”
But such was not to be. Adeodatus died around 390, not yet 20 years old.

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