Community—The Other Key Ingredient
posted 10/03/2005
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During a recent toy repair project at home, I shared the recipe of two-part epoxy glue with my eight-year-old son. "When both clear gels are mixed together, they become super strong." At the time, though, I didn't realize that I had accidentally glued a screwdriver to the table.
Children's ministry also has two key ingredients that, when mixed together, make it "super strong": creative, relevant Bible teaching and community. Teaching tools, techniques and creative curriculum seem to receive more than their measure of attention. So for now, let's stick with the other key ingredient—community.
"Miss Jamie lets me say stuff without interrupting me. I wish my brother was like that," is why 4-year-old Erin loves the Yellow Team, her Sunday morning small group.
What is community for kids? The simplest formula is to divide your children by age into groups of six or eight, assign a leader, and call it a small group. That's a starting point. But the recipe for real community involves much more.
The world today is a tough place to grow up. The obvious emotional pain of divorce or parental absence, the quiet dilemma of watching hurricanes destroy lives and livelihoods, and persistent peer pressures all mix and stick to kids more than ever. For many kids, safety in life seems non-existent. That is our opportunity.
On Sunday morning, it is possible to offer a place to know and be known, love and be loved, serve and be served. It is possible to be a place where every child is individually treasured and valued—an emotionally safe place. A place where, every week, kids can build healthy bonds and trust with the same kids and same leader. This place is rarely found in other parts of a kid's life.
"I know we have real community when no one is seen as fat or thin, rich or poor, cool or outcast; everyone is accepted the way they are," describes Joy, a fifth grade small group leader. "They don't get that level of full acceptance in school or their neighborhood."
Girls in Joy's group enjoy relationships with each other, as well as the benefit of seeing an adult Christ-follower up close. To that end, kids in small slices of community can see that Christianity does work in real people. And in this safe setting, they have the freedom to figure out how to really apply Bible truth to their lives, ask questions, and process life's ragged edges.
Without being interrupted.
Building Community for Kids
Regardless of size, any children's ministry that strives to build thriving community should begin with four essentials.
First, your ministry must be completely clear on the importance of kids to God. That must serve as the primary motivation to building community. The disciples received extreme clarity on this in Matthew 19. God loves people and knows they should not face life alone. This includes little people.
Next, elevate community as a high value in your ministry and state it boldly. Adopt a strong statement such as, "We value intentional shepherding of children through small groups." The level of commitment your ministry has to building community will be proportional to the clarity and conviction of the vision you cast.
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