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 Campus Life, January/February 2002
The Nightmare of September 11
When terrorists attacked the World Trade Center, Phillip Santiago and Matthew Rivera were in school just three blocks away. This is their story.
by Mark Moring
Phillip Santiago, a freshman at New York's High School for Leadership and Public Service, was sitting in his ninth-floor classroom, trying to pay attention to the lesson.
It was a gorgeous morning. Phillip looked out the window, and saw paper flying everywhere. Strange, he thought. But then, when your school's in downtown Manhattan, strange sights aren't all that uncommon.
In another classroom on the 10th floor, Matthew Rivera, a sophomore, thought he smelled something burning. But again, in Manhattan, strange smells aren't so unusual, either.
But then something terribly unusual did happen.
"It sounded like an explosion," says Matthew, 15, "and the floor shook as if it was an earthquake."
"Everything started to shake," adds Phillip, 14, "and everybody started running for the door."
Of course, it wasn't an earthquake. It was a commercial jet, hijacked by terrorists, crashing into the World Trade Center, just three blocks away from Phillip and Matthew's school.
On September 11, 2001, terrorists hijacked four planes, crashing two into the World Trade Center and one into the Pentagon in Washington, D.C. The fourth plane crashed into a Pennsylvania field, likely because of the heroic efforts of several passengers (see "He Was a Hero" on page 45.)
Matthew and Phillip, church buddies and best friends since preschool, hadn't heard or felt the explosion when the first jet crashed into one of the twin towers. But they definitely heard and felt it when the second one crashed into the tower closer to their school. Immediately, students scrambled for their backpacks, and were soon running for their lives.
"This is unreal"
Students and teachers headed toward the lower tip of Manhattan, ending up with thousands of others in the Battery Park area, about 10 blocks away from the World Trade Center. Most of them were staring upward in disbelief.
Matthew and Phillip, who weren't together, were stunned by the sight: Twin towering infernos, the upper floors of both buildings swallowed up in flames.
"I couldn't believe what I was seeing," says Matthew. "I told one guy, 'This is unreal. This is the stuff that you would see in a movie.'"
Phillip couldn't stop staring either. As he looked closer, he saw something he'll never forget.
"I saw what I thought was debris falling down," he says. "But then I realized it was people jumping out. You could see their bodies floating down like snowflakes. It was hard to believe it was real."
But the horror was just beginning.
Moments later, first one tower, then the other, came crashing down. More than a million tons of steel and concrete110 stories soaring more than a quarter of a mile into the skysimply collapsed in a heap. Massive walls of dust, debris and smoke surged in all directions through the canyons of Manhattan's streets, sending thousands running for refuge.
"We heard something that sounded like thunder," Phillip says. "And all of a sudden, this wall of white stuff started coming toward us, darker and darker as it got closer. Everybody was scared, and started running."
"People started running in all directions," adds Matthew. "The smoke was coming everywhere, so we didn't know where to run. Everybody was going crazy."
When the smoke and debris overtook them, they couldn't see and could hardly breathe. That's when Matthew thought he might die.
"I was just thinking, God, help me, please help me!" he says. "I just wanted to get out of there and get to a safe place."
For Matthew, that safe place was his churchPrimitive Christian Church, where his father, Marcos Rivera, is the pastor. Matthew rounded up the few students and teachers who were with him, and led the way to the church. "We covered our mouths with our T-shirts so we could breathe," he says, "and we just walked through the smoke."
As Matthew approached the church, he saw familiar faces walking into its doors, and he began to feel a sense of relief. But not until he met his father at the front door did he feel completely safe.
"My dad hugged me and he started crying," Matthew says. "He said he was scared and that he was very glad to see me." Matthew, covered with ashes and bits of concrete, said a prayer of thanks on the spot.
Meanwhile, Phillip, a friend and two teachers were also trying to get away from the deadly cloud of dust and debris.
"It was like breathing in fire and smoke," he says. "We were running, and we had to stop and make ourselves cough some of that stuff up, because it was very bad."
They thought they might not make it. But Phillip prayed, "God, show me the way," and almost instantly got an answer: An unlocked parked car. Phillip opened the door and told the others to jump in. Then he jumped in and shut the door behind him.
Clean air! They could breathe again.
"It's amazing that we found the car," Phillip says. "In New York, you never find parked cars that are unlocked. I think God provided that for us."
In the car, they caught their breath and dusted off. Soon, they were on the move again, running all the way to Phillip's home, where his mother had feared the worst, at one point saying to God, "He is with you!"
But moments later, shortly after Matthew had been reunited with his dad at the church, Phillip fell into his mom's arms at home.
"We got to the lobby," he says, "and the elevator door opened, and my mom was there. She was crying and she hugged me and everything."
Phillip told his mom that God had given him peace, direction and endurance all the way home.
"God was in control"
As Matthew and Phillip look back on the incident, they talk about how it changed their lives forever.
For one thing, it's changed their daily routine, because their school building was temporarily closed. Though it wasn't damaged, the area was deemed unsafe. And for a while, Matthew and Phillip attended another high school uptown. Instead of going a few blocks to their old school, they had to take a train to their new one.
Second, there's the empty skylinea constant reminder of what happened.
"My dad used to drive me to school every day," Matthew says, "and throughout the whole ride, you could see the World Trade Center. And now, every time I walk to church, I look up where the buildings are supposed to be, but they're not. Every day is a reminder."
And then there were the fears and bad dreams.
"I couldn't sleep the first night," Matthew says. "And for a while after that, I had some nightmaresdreams about things getting blown up, family and friends getting hurt, our country going to war, stuff like that. But I have no fears right now. I feel OK."
Phillip hasn't had any nightmareshe says that's "straight from God"but he had some fears in the days after the attack.
"Every time a plane flew over, I would get kind of scared," he says.
Both guys say the experience has brought them closer to God.
"It has actually increased my faith," says Matthew. "When I think about what happened, it could've been much worse. Those buildings could have fallen to the side and knocked over other buildings, like a domino effect. What if it had fallen like that while I was in school?
"I have no doubts God was there, that he was in control. Some people are saying God did this, but I don't think so. I think he just let it happen, you know? I don't think anything evil comes from God."
Phillip adds, "I just want to keep living my life, and that's it. I just have to trust in God; there's nothing else I can really do."
He says that won't be difficult.
"If it wasn't for God, I wouldn't have made it out of there in one piece," Phillip says. "Maybe I would've made it out alive, but I definitely would've gotten hurt.
"This has changed my whole perspective on life. Now I love God even more. Now I'm starting to live day to day, instead of month to month and year to year, because you never know what might happen."
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Was God Paying Attention?
Where was God on that dreadful, horrible day when terrorists struck America, killing thousands of innocent people?
Searching for answers, I turn to another event that took place so many years ago. To a time when, after creating the world, God breathed life into two human beings. He loved them so much, and he longed for them to love him, too. But because real love requires the choice to love (or not to love), they chose to turn their backs on their Creator. They chose to walk away from his perfect love and his perfect plans. And the consequences of their rebellion? All kinds of sin and evil, leading to a flood that destroyed all but a handful of humanity (see Genesis 3-7).
Even today, God gives us a choice: To love him or turn our backs on him. And over and over, people choose to turn their backs on him. They either spit defiantly in his face, or simply act like he's not important. And the consequences of this rebellion? A world where evil can bring terror and destruction.
Even so, God is still present. His mark of wonder and beauty still graces the world around us. Yes, his light does shine, even in places where darkness has seemingly taken over.
So where was God on 9/11?
I believe Godthe God who allowed his own Son to be murdered for the sins of the worldwas right there in the middle of all the explosions, smoke and flying debris. He was there, walking amidst the pain, suffering, death and tears. He was also there during all the search-and-rescue efforts, using every act of self-less heroism and compassion to demonstrate his own invisible yet loving presence.
No, my questions and yours aren't wrapped up in a neat and pretty package of answers. There are simply no neat and pretty answers in a time of such ugly and messy tragedy.
But I do believe God has answers, very personal answers, to your own very personal questions. I encourage you to take those questions directly to himand listen quietly for him to whisper gently into your soul. And let him speak to you through the Bible, particularly the Gospel of John.
Go ahead. Take a closer look at Jesus, this man who claimed to be God, and who dropped himself right in the middle of human suffering. Try to find out who this Jesus really is, dig deeply to discover his feelings, his passions. Take a good, long look into his heart. When you do, many of your questions, as important as they are, may melt away in the warmth of his incomprehensible love.
Chris Lutes
For more insight into God's apparent "silence" in the midst of tragedy, read "When It's Hard to Believe" (Campus Life, March/April 2001). You can find it online at christianitytoday.com/cl/2001/002/7.38.html.
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"He Was a Hero"
Youth leader Todd Beamer, who died on one of the hijacked planes, was dearly loved by his students.
Natalia Lentini was 12 when her dad left, and she desperately wanted somebody to fill those shoes.
Along came Todd Beamer.
"Todd was a wonderful role model," says Natalia, 16. "He honored his wife, he loved his children, and he loved God. He was exactly what I wanted a dad to be."
Todd Beamer was that and more to many teenagers at Princeton Alliance Church in Plainsboro, New Jersey. As a Sunday school teacher and volunteer youth leader, Todd touched the lives of many students.
Todd was on United Airlines Flight 93, one of the four hijacked planes on September 11. The plane was apparently headed for a target in Washington, D.C., possibly the White House or the Capitol.
But several passengersincluding Toddapparently stormed the cockpit and fought with the terrorists, causing the plane to crash in a Pennsylvania field. (Todd's wife, Lisa, and their two young children were not on the plane.)
News reports praised Todd and the other brave passengers as heroes, averting what might have been another disaster like the World Trade Center or the Pentagon.
"When I heard he was a hero, that made me so proud," says Rob Lally, 17, Todd's student for four years. "That brought joy to a situation where there isn't much joy to be found. He could've saved hundreds or thousands of lives with what he did."
Linda Ayala, 16, agrees.
"I had the biggest smile on my face when I heard he was a hero," she says. "That's one thing that has made this easier."
Natalia, Rob and Linda say Todd was a guy who could brighten anybody's day, a leader with a great sense of humor who always went out of his way to show care and compassion.
"He really had a way of connecting with people," Rob says.
Linda says Todd's death was symbolic of the way he lived life.
"He lived a Christ-like life," she says. "And his death was similar to what Christ did. Jesus laid down his life for others, and Todd did the same thing. That makes me happy and proud to have known him."
Mark Moring
Todd's widow, Lisa, has established the Todd M. Beamer Memorial Foundation to aid charities and some of Todd's passions, including assisting students and promoting Christian sports. Check it out at beamerfoundation.org.
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Copyright © 2002 by the author or Christianity Today International/Campus Life magazine.
Click here for reprint information on Campus Life.
January/February, Vol. 60, No. 6, Page 42
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