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In her book She Said Yes (Plough), Misty Bernall calls her slain daughter, Cassie, an "unlikely martyr." That is because to her and her husband, Brad, Cassie was first and foremost a teen. Like most blossoming adolescents, Cassie struggled with heady issues of faith and witness while wishing she could shed a few pounds and that the boys in her youth group would notice her. Her silken blond hair turned heads, while her wardrobe preferences included oversized jeans, a camouflage tank top, and "her beloved black velvet Doc Martens, which she wore rain or shine, even with dresses," notes her mother in the book.

Cassie's earlier detour to the dark side is well documented. For a brief but excruciating season of rebellion, according to a friend cited in Misty's book, " 'She told me that she had like given her soul to Satan. … She said, "There's no way I can love God." ' " What is less known, however, are the struggles Cassie encountered after she had been delivered from these dark forces and walked in new life in Christ.

Brad Bernall is employed at Lockheed Martin, and Misty is on leave from Lock heed Martin's Titan finance group. On April 20, 1999, they and their son, Chris, 15, woke up to a normal world; by lunchtime, their world had shattered. There were moments they wondered what would have happened if Cassie had said no when her killers asked, "Do you believe in God?" But with the muzzle of a gun pressed against her head, Cassie paused, then answered with a decisive yes. According to her mom, Cassie said yes to God every postconversion day of her short life.

When did you learn that Cassie's killer asked her if she believed in God before he shot her?
Brad: Misty heard that first when she was still between the library and the school looking for Cassie on one of those buses. Somebody had told Dave [Mc Pher son, the youth pastor], and I think Dave may have told us.

Misty: When Dave was standing there waiting for the youth group to help us find Cassie, some girl ran by him and said, 'Oh my God, they asked her if she believed in God, and when she said yes, they shot her.' Dave instantly thought, Who else would that be but Cassie?

Did learning about her confession of faith offer any consolation?
Misty: When we went on the Oprah show, doing a tribute to all the kids, the first thing she asked me was, 'Do you wish she would have said no?' After knowing that a girl begged for her life and was released, as a mom, you think, What if she would have begged? But I can't think of a more honorable way to die than to profess your faith in God. We were very proud of her before this happened in her stand for Christ. She said yes to Christ every day of her walk. It wasn't always easy for her.

What did Cassie struggle with, personally or spiritually, after her conversion?
Brad: She was growing by leaps and bounds in the Lord. We found this out after the fact, when we started going through her drawers, reading notes that were passed between her and her friends, and reading her journals. She was a very mature Christian. The depth of the letters that were passed between the girls was phenomenal.

Still, even though she was trying hard, she was pretty unhappy. Aside from church, all she did was school. She hated the hours that she spent on homework. Three to five hours in a night was not unheard of.

Because she was so unhappy she sometimes felt distant from God. She felt like—"Gee, I must still be doing something wrong. I shouldn't be so miserable."

Misty: She would take hard classes, like chemistry and trig. I'd say, "Cass, you could back off." And she'd say, "No, I know I can do it." But it was hard for her. And she struggled with her self-confidence.

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October 4 1999, Vol. 43, No. 11