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Why talk with another person about our personal relationship with God?

When we intend to be God's, to love God and serve God, we begin with high hopes and energy and desire to listen to, love, and follow God. But in our life journey we do not know what we might encounter—what side paths will look interesting, what life circumstances will change our point of view. Birth, death, disease, surprises, love, joy—all these have their say in the journey.

A lot of what you're describing doesn't sound very "spiritual." Spiritual growth seems to include "negative" moments.

As we continue along with God in and through the midst of life, at times we are drawn to God, and at other times we strike out on our own, either consciously or unintentionally. Being in spiritual direction, sharing our journey with others, helps us pay more attention to our lives, how we are responding to and resisting God as we move along. It assists our noticing grace in ways we might have missed.

There are stages in the spiritual journey—of learning, serving, moving inward, opening all our questions, doubts, boredom, settling for mediocrity, having our pat answers blown wide open, being more aware of and responding to God's love, moving toward trusting God no matter what, running away from God when we are angry, hurt, disappointed, or afraid of God, life, or circumstances.

I think of the parable of the seeds falling on different kinds of ground. At times our ground, our hearts, are open, and at other times we are hard ground. Speaking with someone about our prayer and our life helps us notice what's going on and helps us offer our hearts as they are to God, to ask God for grace, mercy, assistance, or even to speak about our hardness and lack of desire. The divided human heart dwells in us, not just in others. There are many things we cannot see about ourselves—we need each other.

What keeps spiritual direction from being a subjective interpretation of another's life?

Eugene Peterson, in talking about spiritual direction, says, "Responding to God is not sheer guesswork. The Christian community has acquired wisdom through the centuries that provides guidance." Spiritual direction is grounded within the Christian community and the wisdom that God gives. It isn't something totally subjective or mystical. It is grounded firmly in Christian theology, prayer, spirituality, and Scripture.

What is the typical agenda in a spiritual direction session?

From listening to believers across a wide range of Christian faith traditions talk about their experiences in spiritual friendship, I am convinced that the charism of spiritual direction is always present in the body of Christ: "Where two or three come together in my name, there I am with them" (Matthew 18:20). Most Christians have had some experience of seeking God with another person, and been aware of the Holy Spirit's participation with them, but not called it spiritual direction.

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April 23 2001, Vol. 45, No. 6