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The question "Who am I" cannot be answered without first answering the question "Who are we?" We cannot conceive of ourselves (without stumbling into mere abstraction or doing violence to who we are) until we conceive of the other. At a very practical level, no human life can survive without the reciprocation of love.

Thus, our primary duty in life is not to find ourselves, to develop our gifts, or to make sense of life. Instead, we are called to love others so that they can come into existence, while they do the same for us.

That includes the miracle of creating babies, but it also means we can bring already breathing beings into existence. A simple example: As a teenager, my church youth director told me he wanted me to prepare a devotional for one of our weekly meetings. I objected, saying I was not ready or capable of doing so. He said I was being silly, that I was indeed ready, and insisted I prepare the devotional. I've had many such encounters in my life, when people have seen something in me that I have not seen in myself, and they have called it forth, out of the chaos. They have created me, that is, made me who I am today.

Sharing a meal or conversation, even sitting in silence with another, are acts that validate the existence of the other. Even we introverts recognize that life would be unbearable—I mean this literally; I would likely commit suicide—if we didn't have people in our lives. People like me may find it difficult to create or sustain intimacy, but because intimacy is available to entice (and frighten!) me, my life is not only bearable but also possible.

This all starts from the fact that we are first loved by God into existence, an existence framed by the Trinity-in-love, the image into which we have been created. Thus, we share in the mission of this Trinity, which is to create and sustain other beings in love.

That is not only our mission, but also our very identity: beings in relationship, beings defined by love. Because to love is to suffer, we might not want to be defined by this! But Jesus never said "abundant life" would be an easy life, only a blessed one.

Mark Galli is managing editor of Christianity Today and author of Jesus Mean and Wild: The Unexpected Love of an Untameable God (Baker 2007). You can respond to this column below, or on his blog.

Copyright © 2007 Christianity Today. Click for reprint information.

Previous SoulWork columns include:

Seeker Unfriendly | We need more than worship that makes sense. (June 14, 2007)

The Cost of Christian Education | Getting schooled in the faith is more unnerving than I care to admit. (May 31, 2007)

Surviving a Family-Wrecking Economy | What the church can do about working mothers. (May 17, 2007)

The Real Secret of the Universe | Why we disdain feel-good spirituality but shouldn't. (May 3, 2007)

Peace in a World of Massacre | What Jesus calls us to when we're most frightened. (April 17, 2007)

The Good Friday Life | We need something more than another moral imperative. (April 4, 2007)

Re:generation Quarterly published Augustine of Hippo's explanation of the Trinity.

Christianity Today articles on the nature of the Trinity include:

The Mission of the Trinity | Singaporean theologian Simon Chan says 'missional theology' has not gone far enough. (June 4, 2007)

In the Word: The 'Shyness' of God | Self-centeredness is cured by looking deeply within the life of the Trinity. (February 5, 2001)

Adding Up the Trinity | What is stimulating the renewed interest in what many consider the most enigmatic Christian doctrine? (April 28, 1997)

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June (Web-only) 2007, Vol. 51