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Mothering teaches me that spirituality is not only about folding hands and closing eyes. As my daily life has become more physical and immediate, so has my experience of God. My favorite undiscipline, nursing, offers me reason to sit in a glider rocker for eight hours a day, one or another babe at breast. This sitting—a meditation of sorts—encourages generosity and patience that I hope will bless my sons and others I encounter. Changing a hundred diapers each week cultivates endurance; crankiness can nurture quick forgiveness; exhaustion calls for humility and community. And, best of all, babies themselves provide unlimited chances to live in gratitude and joy. Practicing conventional disciplines, when we're able, prepares us to simply practice the presence of God—to borrow a phrase from Brother Lawrence—in seasons of life filled with disorder.

The Benedictine rule describes its purpose as "seeking the grace of God with the help of many brothers." As a married woman with children, my spirituality looks little like that of a monk, but I seek the same grace. I do it with the help of two wee brothers, Oliver and Wesley. And though the life of my spirit as I've known it is impoverished, I feel rich. I'll see a spiritual director, read the Psalms, and enjoy solitude again as soon as I get the chance. For now, I'm practicing the spiritual undisciplines.

Jenell Williams Paris's twins are now 23 months old. These reflections were written 2 months after their birth. Paris is associate professor of anthropology at Bethel University and the author of Urban Disciples (Judson, 2000) and Birth Control for Christians (Baker, 2003).

Copyright © 2007 Christianity Today. Click for reprint information.

Paris has more information about herself at her Bethel University page. She blogs at The Paris Project, Parisbabies, and the Generous Orthodoxy Think Tank.

She wrote more about motherhood in The Morning News.

Previous articles by Jenell Williams Paris include:

When Mother's Day Is Hard | Taking solace in Scripture's difficult and unsentimental image of motherhood. (May 1, 2004)

Has Natural Birth Control Been Proved Impossible? | "Don't believe the media reports, cautions the author of Birth Control for Christians" (July 1, 2003)

Community and Conscience | Catholics and contraception. (Books & Culture, May/June 2005)

The Truth About Sex | Even Christians get seduced by the sexual lies our culture proclaims (November 12, 2002)

Sex Ed. For Adults | God-given longings in a broken world. (Books & Culture, September 1, 2004)

Beyond Integration | Two recent books on race (Re:generation Quarterly, July 1, 2000)

Why I No Longer Live in a Community (Re:generation Quarterly, April 1, 1999)

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May 2007, Vol. 51, No. 5