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Around the World in 80 Days Our rating: Rate this movie   MPAA rating: PG (for action violence, some crude humor and mild language) Theater release: June 16, 2004 by Walt Disney Pictures VHS release: October 12, 2004 Directed by: Frank Coraci Runtime: 2 hours Cast: Jackie Chan (Passepartout/Lau Xing), Steve Coogan (Phileas Fogg), Cecile De France (Monique La Roche), Jim Broadbent (Lord Kelvin), Ewen Bremner (Inspector Fix) Related: Talk About It/Family Corner

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If you want to see a great film adaptation of Jules Verne's novel, Around the World in 80 Days, check out the 1956 version* starring David Niven as Phileas Fogg. If you want to see an awful adaptation of Verne's classic novel, go to your local theater and watch this 2004 version. But don't say I didn't warn you.

80 Days, directed by Frank Coraci, clocks in at an excruciating 120 minutes. For those two hours, I followed Phileas Fogg (British comedian Steve Coogan), Passepartout (martial arts master Jackie Chan), and Monique La Roche (Hollywood newcomer Cecile De France) through title card after title card of cities (Paris, China, San Francisco) all the while wishing that Jules Verne hadn't included such a lengthy itinerary in his novel.

Cecile de France, Steve Coogan, and Jackie Chan

To be fair, 80 Days is not an easy story to film. Verne wrote a novel in which the story and characters traversed several continents and met a wealth of diverse people in a wealth of odd situations. Verne also incorporated his fascination with science by writing of Fogg's great inventions and ideas—things that would be difficult to put to film convincingly, even in our high–tech world of Computer Generated Images (CGI).

However, this film version does maintain the book's basic premise in that members of an elite English club challenge Fogg to travel around the world in, you guessed it, 80 days. Fogg accepts the challenge with the understanding that, if he wins, he can assume the title of Minister of Science within England's Royal Academy. If he loses, he must forfeit his right to invent and he must steer clear of the Academy. Note here the first of many departures from the original story. In the novel, Fogg's wager is 20,000 pounds, not necessarily his reputation and lifestyle as an inventor.

The second, and more glaring, departure from Verne's novel is Jackie Chan as Passepartout, Fogg's "French" valet (the 1956 version featured a memorable performance from Mexico native Cantinflas as the quirky sidekick). Chan's Passepartout has stolen the Jade Buddha from the Bank of England and must return the Buddha to his small Chinese village in order to save his people. As Passepartout runs from the police, he conveniently meets up with Fogg, who takes Passepartout under his wing as his personal valet. The two then begin their adventure 'round the world.

At least Jackie Chan's fight scenes are cool

And what an exhausting adventure it is. 80 Days forces you to live in a world of extremes. It would seem that each of the film's actors resolved to create one dimensional, over–the–top caricatures. Coogan channels Robin Williams' Flubber performance for inspiration for his distracted and idiot savant Fogg. Chan overreacts to every stimulus in the film, usually resulting in a choreographed fight scene (OK, I admit the fight scenes were pretty cool, but honestly, just go rent Rumble in the Bronx). And, De France puts on her best damsel in distress/cheerleader face to complicate matters and encourage the gang, respectively.

It's precisely because I spent the entire time at the movie's frothy surface that I found I didn't care what happened to the characters. When a movie fails to acknowledge human relationships (and I'd like a bit more than La Roche's "We care because we're friends" quips), the movie fails to engage the audience. 80 Days proves that 2 hours of chaos and "eye–popping special effects" do not entertain the masses.

Essentially, 80 Days is a vehicle for Chan's creative fight powers. So, Chan fans might like this movie—especially the battle between the Ten Tigers and the Black Scorpions; that scene stirred me from my 80 Days haze long enough to get me through the rest of the movie.

Unfortunately, this movie is also full of hot air

I was amazed at how little actually happens for a movie with so much action. Sadly, the fast pace and ridiculousness of the film prevented numerous opportunities for more redemptive plotlines. I would have liked to see serious (or even normal) exchanges between Fogg and Passepartout as well as between Fogg and La Roche. Verne's material is adventurous and witty, but it also holds great capacity for character development, and that's exactly what this film avoided.

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