2 of 2

Mitch (Dane Cook, right) and Dan both have a thing for Marie

But perhaps the film's greatest gift is the way it doggedly refuses to feel like a Big Hollywood Movie; despite its comparatively large budget and the well-known names in the cast, it's every bit as intimate as Pieces of April, feeling not like a blockbuster, but like the kind of small, simple movie that is discovered by only a few, but is forever cherished by those lucky enough to find it. Perhaps it's because there's not an iota of pretense here, not the slightest hint of hipster irony or of cynicism. It's a movie about family, made by people who know about family, who are concerned about family, who believe in family.

Which is not to say that everyone will believe in this particular family. The camaraderie shared amongst the Burns clan will strike some as a bit too sincere, perhaps saccharine or sentimental. After all, these people seem to do everything together, and they generally do it with smiles on their faces; they compete for crossword puzzle dominance, they do morning aerobics on the front lawn, they share big, home-cooked meals. They even put on a family talent show. Some might suggest that no family really behaves like this—but, apparently, the Burns family does. The characters are based on the real-life family of screenwriter Pierce Gardner, who says that almost everything the Burns family does—save for the morning aerobics—is completely true to life.

Morning aerobics for the whole family!

Hedges is the go-to guy for movies about family, and this film is positive without insulting our intelligence—something we don't see very often at all. As his feelings for Marie grow—and as he is reminded of his responsibilities as a father and as a brother—Dan wrestles with some weighty ethical questions, and the film doesn't necessarily offer easy answers so much as it points to the importance of our family in keeping us grounded, in holding us accountable while still giving us forgiveness, room to grow and pursue what matters to us. It's a movie about family, about responsibility, and about choices, and—best of all, for parents of children the same age as Dan's—it's devoid of foul language and explicit sexuality, making it a film about family that can actually take your family to see—at least your older kids, anyway. It's a movie for grown-ups that you can watch with your children.

Talk About It

1. Dan wrestles with his responsibilities to his brother, to his daughters, and to himself. Do you think he achieves any kind of balance here? How should these responsibilities be divided?
2. Do you think Dan makes the right or the wrong choice concerning Marie? Why?
3. Why do you think Dan has such a hard time following his own advice?
4. What does the film suggest about the role of family in our lives? About what a family should do for us, and what we should do for our family?

The Family Corner

Dan in Real Life is rated PG-13 for some innuendo. It's actually a very "soft" PG-13 that might well have gotten a PG rating. There is no foul language or explicit sex, but there are a few sexual euphemisms, mostly on par with innuendo you might see on, say, The Cosby Show or Home Improvement—and these are likely to go over the heads of younger children. There is also a scene in which a female character finds herself awkwardly undressing in front of a man, but nothing explicit is seen; still, it might not be appropriate for very young children. The movie has such a positive portrayal of family that it's something parents might consider watching and discussing with their kids.

Photos © Copyright Focus Features

© Josh Hurst subject to licensing agreement with Christianity Today International. All rights reserved. Click for reprint information.

• Plugged In
  
• Crosswalk
  
• Catholic News Service
  
• Past the Popcorn

first page |  2 of 2