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Home > Holidays > Father's Day

FATHERING: Negotiate or Direct?
By Robert Leslie Holmes
Key Bible Verse: He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is careful to discipline him. PROVERBS 13:24

Bonus Reading: Proverbs 23:13-14; 29:15, 17

Adam caught our attention as we watched the seals in San Francisco Bay. His mother repeatedly begged the child, about six years old, to leave the slimy sand in which he was digging.

Finally, his mother threatened, "Come now! Or Dad will get you." Sure enough, Dad soon arrived. "Okay, Adam," he whimpered, "please come." Adam, digging and filthy, paid no heed. Dad's second approach demonstrated what was really wrong: "Okay, Adam, let's negotiate. What will it take to make you leave?"

Negotiate! That scene was a far cry from the role God originally intended for fathers. The Lord has called fathers to demonstrate godly leadership. Negotiation gives children executive equivalency, whereas direction teaches them to respect authority and to be responsible in their actions.

A father and son on a mountain climb came to a particularly treacherous place. The father paused to consider which way to go, and the lad called out trustingly, "Choose the right path, Daddy. I'm following right behind you." God calls us to be stewards of our own souls and the souls of our families. May we do it well for both Christ's sake and theirs.

—Robert Leslie Holmes
in
God's Man

Personal Challenge
• Which comes easier for you: negotiating or directing?
Thought to Apply
A permissive home is a home where you don't love enough to exercise the authority that Christ gave you.
Ben Haden (pastor)

Men of Integrity DevotionalMen of Integrity Devotional
Drawing on themes of the Promise Keepers movement, this daily devotional guide brings you compelling stories, timely quotes, practical help, and personal challenges together in an easy-to-read, easy to apply format.


Men of IntegrityMen of Integrity magazine
Men of Integrity is a daily devotional that uses key Bible verses with testimonials to help men grow in their faith.


Excerpted from the Men of Integrity Devotional, week 51, Wednesday. Copyright © 2001 Christianity Today International. Used by permission of Word Publishing Company, Nashville, TN. All rights reserved. For reprint information call 630-260-6200.







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