PARENTING & FAMILY
Sometimes I get upset and angry with my kids. How can I maintain a loving attitude when I'm about to explode?

(Proverbs 15:1-4, 18)
Realize that anger only breeds more conflict.
It's best to withdraw from an explosive situation until you have control of your anger. Everyone gets upset and angry, but problems come when you rush to speak out of anger. Once "harsh words" are spoken, they can't be recalled. But "a kind answer soothes angry feelings" (15:1; see also verse 18).

With your anger under control, you can talk with your children about what's upsetting you. In that setting, it's okay to admit your anger. Focusing on inappropriate behavior rather than blaming your children helps them know exactly how they need to change. If you use kind words rather than harsh ones, they are more likely to want to change. And by focusing on behavior, you can reassure your children of your unconditional love for them as persons. (See also Matthew 11:25-29; Titus 3:3-8).

Words to remember:
Kind words are good medicine.—Proverbs 15:4

Proverbs 15:4
The LORD Sees Everything
15 A kind answer soothes angry feelings, but harsh words stir them up.
²Words of wisdom come from the wise, but fools speak foolishness.

³The LORD sees everything, whether good or bad.
⁴Kind words are good medicine, but deceitful words can really hurt.

¹⁸Losing your temper causes a lot of trouble, but staying calm settles arguments.

These excerpts are from The Bible for Today's Christian Woman. This Bible is no longer in print. But new this month is the Woman's Life Bible, which includes the same great features for today's busy woman. Click here to purchase the Woman's Life Bible.

Copyright © 2001 by the author or Christianity Today, Inc. All rights reserved. Excerpted from The Bible for Today's Christian Woman, CEV, pages 710-711. Used by permission. For reprint information call 630-260-6200.