May your roots go down deep into the soil of God's marvelous love. And may you have the power to understand, as all God's people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love really is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is so great you will never fully understand it.
EPHESIANS 3:17-19

But when romantic love becomes the thing we crave, Scripture tells us we've missed the boat. There's only one love that is wide enough and deep enough to satisfy: God's love (Eph. 3).

Who or what is satisfying your deepest needs? Maybe it's time to take a look.

Hooked on Romance
When my husband, Rick, and I moved to Southern California in 1977, my life seemed far from under my control. Neither of us had wanted to make the move, but that's where his job took us.

I had my three children in quick succession. Since I didn't know anybody, I built my life around them—and around reading. Romance novels camouflaged how I really felt—isolated and miserable.

I began voraciously devouring westerns, sensual historical novels, gothic romances, and realized, I can write this. Eventually I published thirteen novels in the mainstream market—and they met with success, selling roughly three million copies.

Writing became increasingly important to me; it was my escape. I could control the characters in my books when I couldn't control the people in my life. Rick worked long hours—leaving early in the morning, coming home late, exhausted, with little energy left for me and our children—so I began pumping a lot of energy into creating my stories.

But my passion for romance novels was taking its toll. At one point, Rick told me, "If you had a choice between your writing and the kids and me, you'd take your writing." It was a shock—but he was right.

We decided we needed to make some changes. We moved again, this time back to northern California, where Rick started his own business. Despite all the external changes, inside we were spiritually starving, though we didn't know it at the time. We were fighting a lot.

Out of curiosity, I accepted a neighbor's invitation to church a few weeks after our move. The warmth and love I felt in that congregation drew me back again and again. I started taking my kids with me, then Rick came along. Our lives began to change—not from the outside, but from the inside out. When Christ became our personal Savior, Rick and I were baptized together. Our children soon followed.

Since I've become a Christian, I've learned I need to choose things that enlighten, encourage, and assist me in my walk with Christ. Sometimes I'll feel uncomfortable when I'm reading a book or watching a movie, and I'll have to toss the book out or change the channel. I allow God to soften my heart to the point where I'm sensitive to what the Holy Spirit tells me. Obedience is my loving response to my heavenly Father (which is why I didn't write again until I'd spent several years studying God's word).

Now I'm writing Christian romance novels instead; several of my characters have been inspired by people and events in the Bible. I've learned that the entire Bible is a love story—filled with God's love for us. The media tells us romance and sex are what count, not relationship. But what we really need is Jesus' love and a relationship with him. Only then can our deepest needs be satisfied—something no novel can ever do.

—Francine Rivers

2. Redefine love. Many romance novels' definition of love is shallow—a man and a woman can fulfill all their needs (including sexual desires before marriage) between themselves without God. Read 1 Corinthians 13 for a refresher course in real love.

3. Go to the source of romance. The desire for romance isn't wrong; it's God-given. God made sexual desire to be a blessing—in the context of marriage. Ask the Author of romance to help you meet these desires in healthy ways.

—FR

Faith Focus
How much time do you spend searching for romance in your life (i.e., reading romance novels, watching soap operas, expecting gestures from your husband or boyfriend)? Why? If you're hooked on romance, what one step can you take today to redirect your passion toward a relationship with God?

The 30 Days Series is a 3 book set offering 30 thought provoking daily devotions each. Each day's lesson offers a Scripture passage, short message or story, quote for the day, tips on implementing the lesson, and a suggested prayer. These 30 day devotionals are powerful little books that you won't want to be without. Order the 3 book set or pick from the 3 individual titles.

Copyright © 2001 by the author or Christianity Today, Inc. All rights reserved. Excerpted from 30 Days to a More Incredible You, by Ramona Cramer Tucker, pages 116-121. Used by permission. For reprint information call 630-260-6200.