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Q My boyfriend is very good looking. Whenever we're alone, he's really sweet to me, but the moment another girl walks in the room, he either forgets all about me or acts like I'm just one of the guys. I've told him that I feel like he treats those flirty girls as if they're more important than me, and he says I have nothing to worry about since we have so much more than just a flirty relationship. But why am I still so jealous?

A Jealousy comes from insecurity. Plenty of people struggle with it even if they don't have a good-looking boyfriend who flirts. Maybe you're just naturally jealous because you don't feel that you deserve this handsome hunk. Maybe you're primed to overreact when anyone else catches his eye. If you think this might be true of you, I'd recommend talking to somebody—your youth leader, a close friend, a counselor—who can help you examine yourself and work through these insecurities.

Even if you are insecure, however, a guy shouldn't trample your feelings! Tell your boyfriend that if you really have such a great relationship, you'll both show concern for each other, especially in those areas where you feel weak or vulnerable. Be honest with your guy, and explain that you need his help. Figure out what he can do to make things easier for you. Maybe you need him to stand near you, to make eye contact regularly, to include you in his conversation. Whatever it is, don't be shy about explaining how you feel and what he can do to help you. If he's not interested in doing his part, he's not really interested in you.

Q I am only 13 years old. A lot of my friends have already had sex, protected and unprotected. Nothing happened to any of them. But almost two weeks ago my boyfriend and I got carried away and went all the way. Luckily we used a condom. But people have told me you can still get pregnant even if you use a condom. Now I'm really scared, because I haven't gotten my period for over a month. What should I do now?

A The first thing you should do is take a home pregnancy test. What you've heard is true: No birth control method is 100 percent reliable (except abstinence), and condoms have a fairly high failure rate (1.7 percent break during usage, and almost 13 percent slip off at some point during intercourse). Still, the odds are much more in your favor than if you had unprotected sex, so a pregnancy test might bring good news. The sooner you get it done the better, because if you're pregnant, you'll need good medical care immediately. Your health and the health of the baby depend on it.

To get the help you need, your best option is to tell your parents what happened. If there's just no way you could speak up right now, go to the drugstore yourself to get a home pregnancy test. Or call your family doctor (he'll keep it confidential if you insist). You can also talk to your school nurse.

That's just the first step. Next you need to find out what caused you to do something so impulsive and dangerous. Is it the kind of friends you're hanging out with? Is it something in your family life that you're trying to escape? Is it pressure from your boyfriend? Did you get carried away in the heat of the moment? Do you not understand the consequences that come with premarital sex?

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