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"I Don't Believe in Jesus"
I was told I couldn't believe in Jesus. But no one told me what I should believe in.
by Joseph Steinberg as told to Amber Penney


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My parents couldn't have picked a worse time to move, I thought. It's summer; and I don't know anyone in the neighborhood.

I could see some guys playing basketball a few houses up. The thought of introducing myself made me cringe, but I realized I'd have to make the first move. They aren't going to come to you.

"Hey!" My thoughts were interrupted by a guy at the house two doors up. I hadn't noticed him sitting on the back steps. He started walking toward me, and we met in the middle.

"My name's Mark."

"I'm Joseph."

The next thing I knew, Mark was telling me about how he used to be into drugs and get into trouble a lot, but then he heard about Jesus, about how he died on the cross to save us from sin, how he came back to life, and how anyone who believes in him will live forever.

"That's what I believe," he said. "What do you believe?"

"Well," I said, "I'm Jewish. I don't believe in Jesus."

"I asked you what you believe in, not what you don't believe in," he said.

I didn't know what to say. Being one of the few Jewish families in Richmond, Virginia, I got asked about my beliefs a lot. "I don't believe in Jesus" was my standard response, and it usually kept people from probing any further.

Mark sensed my hesitancy and asked me if I'd ever read the Bible.

I shook my head.

"You ought to," he said.

We talked awhile longer, and I was really interested in everything Mark said. I'd always wondered if there was a God. I'd lie awake at night wondering what would happen when I died. Even though my parents and I were close, we never talked about things like that. We only went to synagogue a few times a year—for Jewish holidays. So I'd never found any answers to my questions.

Mark intrigued me. He made me want to find out what was act ually in the Bible. So later that afternoon I picked up my dad's Jew ish Bible, the Tenach. (Basic ally, it's the same as the Old Test ament of the Bible Christians read, but the books are in different order.)

I laid down on my bottom bunk and opened the book, remembering something Mark had said: "If you do end up reading the Bible, why don't you pray before you read it, and ask God to show you whether or not it's true."

So that's what I did. And from that day on I started reading it almost every day. The language seemed kind of out dated, but something kept bringing me back.

Read the New Testament?

Mark and I were becoming good friends. And when I was around him I'd get really excited about God. I'd ask him tons of questions. I wanted to know what it meant to live with God forever, like he talked about. I was still afraid of what would happen when I died.

I asked my parents questions, too, but they didn't have many answers. Neither of them had ever read much of the Tenach, and what they told me didn't line up with what I was reading for myself.

Most of my questions were about the Messiah. I had been taught that when he came, he would bring peace to earth. Everyone would get along, and everything would be perfect. Mark, of course, claimed the Messiah had already come. He said it was Jesus.




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