Why Doesn't He Like Me?
If there was one mystery in life I wish I could solve, it would be this: How do you recover from a broken heart?
I've had my heart broken a few times, and every time I think, Somebody has to know how to make this pain go away. Maybe my friends can give me some insight that will make it all better, and I'll never feel this pain again. But that never happens. You just hurt, and there doesn't seem to be anything you can do about it.
I was crazy about this guy, but he thought he was too old for me. There were only a couple of years between us, but in his mind, I was just a kid. No matter what I did, he just had no interest in me. When I would flirt with him, he didn't even seem to notice. That's the worst! I mean, at least roll your eyes or something. Don't pretend I don't exist!
I would tell my friends, "This guy doesn't like me and I don't get it." They'd say, "There's something wrong with him."
That was easy for them to say, but I couldn't help but feel like there was something wrong with me.
I'd see him talking to another girl and I'd think, Maybe if I dressed like her. … So I bought different clothes, but he still didn't notice me.
Finally, like five months later, I thought, You know what? There's no hope. Have some pride, girl. And I finally just let go.
He wanted us to be friends, but I didn't even want to do that. I couldn't stand the pain of seeing him and knowing that he would never give me that chance to be something more than a friend.
It was awful. I felt like I'd been hit in the stomach. The heartache actually broke my spirit. I wasn't happy and bubbly and giggly anymore.
As I prayed and cried about how lousy I felt, I realized that nothing could really mend my broken heart except God. And the great thing is, God brought people into my life to get my mind off the guy. My friends helped me go out, act dumb, and not care about what anybody else thought. Most of all, I spent more time with God and his Word, and he really started to heal my heart. I can't explain it, but it was incredible to see and feel God working in my life, comforting me through his presence.
So how do you recover from a broken heart? I guess that's a question no one can answer. But one thing's for sure—I wouldn't want to try it without God.
Jaci likes to escape from her troubles by re-reading her fave book, The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe, by C.S. Lewis.
1999 by the author or Christianity Today/Campus Life magazine. Click here for reprint information on Campus Life.