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Gathered from actual court transcripts:

Q: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?

A: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.

Q: How old is your son, the one living with you?

A: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which.

Q: How long has he lived with you?

A: Forty-five years.

Q: Now, doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?

Q: All your responses must be oral, OK? What school did you go to?

A: Oral.

Q: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?

A: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.

Q: Trooper, when you stopped the defendant, were your red and blue lights flashing?

A: Yes.

Q: Did the defendant say anything when she got out of her car?

A: Yes, sir.

Q: What did she say?

A: "What disco am I at?"

Q: Sir, what is your IQ?

A: Well, I can see pretty well, I think.

Q: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?

A: Yes.

Q: And in what ways does if affect your memory?

A: I forget.

Q: You forget. Can you give us an example of something that you've forgotten?

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