Strategies to Keep from Falling
Of all the articles Leadership has published, this may be the most photocopied. We still get requests for it, eight years later, because the author offered specific, practical steps for handling a common and powerful temptation.
When we decided to reprint it, we asked Randy what has happened since the article first appeared. He writes: "I wasn't prepared for the extent to which this article would strike a resonant chord among pastors and parachurch workers around the world. Professors distributed copies to students, missions organizations circulated it to their fields, pastors quoted sections from the pulpit, radio preachers read the list of immorality's consequences.
"One pastor left this message on my answering machine: 'Just wanted you to know that I was on the verge of committing adultery with a woman in my church when I read your booklet [based on the article]. God used it to get hold of me. I cut off the relationship and straightened out my life before tragedy struck. I just wanted to say thanks.'"
"Something terrible has happened." The tense voice was my friend's, calling from across the country. "Yesterday our pastor left his wife and ran off with another woman."
I was sad, but not shocked or even surprised. Fifteen years ago I would have been shocked. Ten years ago I would have been surprised. But I've heard the same story too many times now ever to be surprised again.
I recently spoke on sexual purity at a Bible college. During that week, many students came for counseling, including three I'll call Rachel, Barb, and Pam.
Rachel got right to the point: "My parents sent me to one of our pastors for counseling, and I ended up sleeping with him." Later the same day, Barb, a church leader's daughter, told me through tears, "My dad has had sex with me for years, and now he's starting on my sisters." The next evening I met with Pam. Her story? "I came to Bible college to get away from an affair with my pastor."
For every well-known Christian television personality or author whose impropriety is widely publicized, there are any number of lesser-known pastors, Bible teachers, and parachurch workers who quietly resign or are fired for sexual immorality. Most of us can name several. The myth that ministers are morally invulnerable dies slowly, however, even in the face of overwhelming evidence. But there never has been a mystical antibody that makes us immune to sexual sin. Even those of us who haven't fallen know how fierce is the struggle with temptation.
Furthermore, ministry brings with it serious built-in hazards, moral land mines that can destroy us, our families, and our churches. Among them: our position of influence and that strange blend of ego-feeding flattery and debilitating criticism, which can fill us with either pride or despair. As a result, our perspective can be warped, our resistance to temptation diminished. In addition, our endless tasks and the consequent disorienting fatigue can make ...
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