Leadership Journal

On May 17, the day that same-sex marriage became legal in the state of Massachusetts, Leadership gathered four pastors to discuss the implications.

Phil Busbee is pastor of First Baptist Church of San Francisco, California.

Tony Campolo is a preacher at Mount Carmel Baptist Church in Philadelphia and a sociologist who has taught at Eastern College and the University of Pennsylvania.

Cheryl Sanders pastors Third Street Church of God and teaches ethics at Howard University in Washington, D.C.

John Yates is rector of Falls Church (Episcopal) in Falls Church, Virginia.

The prospect of same-sex marriages raises both pastoral and political issues. What's the most important thing you want to say, pastorally, to a homosexual couple?
Busbee: Our church is located in San Francisco in an area known as "the gateway to the gay community." We feel that God gave us that location for a reason. We're there to be good neighbors, to interact with individuals not movements, and to live out the gospel and invite people to follow Jesus.

Campolo: I speak on about 20 college campuses each year, and no matter what topic I talk on—it could be "Einstein's theory of relativity and the Christian faith"— when I conclude with "Any questions?" one is inevitably "What about homosexual marriage?" You can't avoid it.

There's great antagonism toward the church because it's seen as an oppressive, homophobic institution. I love the church, but it's important to admit that at times the church has been homophobic, unjust, and downright mean.

After that, then we can help them understand where the church is coming from on this issue.

Sanders: It's important to articulate what marriage is and isn't today. Recently in a group discussion I said, "If you took a poll around this table about what century we're in, we would get different answers." If we're all in the twenty-first century, what is the role and purpose of marriage today?

In our congregation, the typical adult is not married. Now they're not necessarily homosexual; some are divorced, widowed, or never married. I believe, based on Scripture and the century that we're in, that marriage is between one man and one woman, but how you speak about marriage is important.

Busbee: That's crucial. Our current practice of marriage is deficient. So many of the Christian man-woman marriages don't seem exemplary. If we're going to have any kind of moral authority to speak out on the issue of marriage, it has to come out of the reality of our lives, not simply out of our doctrine.

Yates: I got concerned about this back in the Sixties, when I saw how dysfunctional so many families were. That led my wife and me into a lifetime commitment to build Christian marriages. A major emphasis of our church is building Christ-centered family life. When Christian marriage isn't doing any better than non-Christian marriage in our culture, we need to help people gain a fresh vision for God's purpose for marriage.

So the biblical model of marriage is one man, one woman, one ...