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Home > 2013 > November Web Exclusives > Honest Questions about Same Sex Attraction

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Sadly, the church is the least helpful institution for believers struggling with homosexual attraction. I believe that's one of the reasons there is so little success for folks like me. On the one side is "Christian condemnation," while on the other side, the GLBT movement is "welcoming and affirming" to those who would simply embrace their homosexual feelings. All the support comes from the wrong side. How can anyone expect a different outcome?

Thanks for reading.


Dear Stan,
Thanks for your gracious reply. You have no idea how important grace is for people in my position. Perhaps it's because it's not as common as we would like.

I can understand how easy it is to drop the answer as you did for the question of God's love. My hope is that you can correct it, or at least find a way to explain it so that folks don't get the wrong idea.

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Related Topics:HomosexualitySex
Posted: November 25, 2013

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Displaying 2–6 of 8 comments


December 18, 2013  11:08am

My grandson is 19-grew up in the church-made the decision at 16 not to attend anymore. He was born as male/female. The doctors decided to do surgery and made him as girl. A psychiatrist/surgeon at John Hopkins Hospital verified at 7 that he has a boy brain. He has had other problems such as dwarfism but growth hormones helped that somewhat. Bones in arms grew to the extent his arm would not take the growth so surgery was performed on both his arms to correct that-took several times to do that. Also, my daughter attempted to get his insurance to help pay for surgeries to correct mistake hospital made. He has male friends that he pals with and they have girlfriends so I don't know if he has sexual desires for them; however, he shows no desire for females. I keep asking him to go to church so he can get in the habit of attending but he just does not seem to want to or see the need to. My question is: if he does turn out to be homosexual is it his fault? I trust a forgiving God.

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Rod Hewitt

November 29, 2013  4:04am

Yes God Loves the sinner,he Hates the Sin.Are we to say Gods Love and Justice for us are wrong?Who are we to dare question Gods Love for us?He does Not delight in the Death of Sinners he calls all to Repentance through his Son Jesus. Can one be a Gay or Lesbian Christian?Answer to that is,for some on first entering the New Life in Christ,it happens Immediately that we can follow in Christs footsteps,others it may take sometime to realise what is going on in their New Life,we Must,through the Power of the Holy Spirit allow him to work in our lives to cleanse us from within,turn from sin and not go back,hence the word Repentance,turn away from sin the wilful sin,what is intended,we are forgiven our past sins and strive to live more each day for God.It is an Abomination to God to be gay, He created One Man,one Woman not same sex,.Remember allow His spirit to work in you he will set you free,I still pray for my cleansing as an ordinary person to live more like Jesus.God really LOVES You

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richard brooks

November 26, 2013  5:20pm

our King is looking for men and women who will love sacrificially, and who are willing to fight in the trenches, not just the pews! We are at war and the american church has retreated, to get fat, lazy, and as the church in laodicea we have become lukewarm. Jesus stated in order, we are to heal the sick, CAST OUT DEMONS, and preach the good news. But i think most americans think demons only exist in africa or the gospels. most homosexual attraction is based in, abuse and the demonic. this is why they still struggle after coming to the cross. These poor souls need deliverance and healing! MGod is looking for men who are willing to cast them out! I know from experience. he has cast out of me 31 demons to date, and delivered me powerfully from this bondage! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yCyp1TpBBAE&sns=em

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Justin Davis

November 26, 2013  4:00pm

I found the both the original article and this exchange to be disappointing. I'll show my cards by sharing that I am a Christian, Baptist, who is also gay. I am currently in divinity school seeking ordination. The issue with both the original article and this exchange is that they present only one perspective on same-sex attracted (gay or lesbian) Christians. Not everyone who is Christian and same sex attracted struggles in darkness. Nor do most or any gay or lesbian people I know, let alone Christians, place their identity in their sexual orientation. I believe that is a trope used to dehumanize gay and lesbian persons to people largely unaware of the issues that we face. I encourage anyone to seek out resources that go beyond their own perspectives. I highly recommend Torn: Rescuing the Gospel from the Gays-vs.Christians Debate by Justin Lee. It is humble, honest, and shares a graceful approach to people on all sides of the issues surrounding LGBT Christians.

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lee carlton

November 26, 2013  3:25pm

I disagree with both of these writers. There is everything to be gained in coming out as a honest person before God and others. The church simply cannot teach people that it the right thing to be honest and then to punish/shame people for being honest. How else can we be authentic in coming to God except; "Just as I am?" The church also has an obligation to search it's own heart and soul as well as being objective in an examination of the scriptures within their cultural context. After all the Good Book has a lot more to say about the misuse of heterosexual sex than about the misuse of homosexual sex. I just do not find a blanket condemnation of homosexual love anywhere in the scripture and definately not from Jesus. Sex in the service of idolatry is the subject of the scriptures, and it is idolatry which is the abomination [not the sexual orientation or the gender of the idolater] being condemned. Blind guide:Stop placing stumbling blocks in front of the people Jesus bled and died for

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