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Home > 2013 > November Online Only > Honest Questions about Same Sex Attraction

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As far as my experience: God has it all figured out, and I'm good with that. Knowing who is in control is a big deal.

As far as my experience: God has it all figured out, and I'm good with that. Knowing who is in control is a big deal. I'm not angry or bitter, just saddened by the situation. I have some Christian friends who are in the same situation, and at least one has turned his back on Christians completely. He still loves the Lord, but can't stand his followers. That's really sad.

Frankly, I believe my "real Christian world" situation is more the norm than what you have taken as a "fairly common type of Christian environment." Personally, I think that a lack of biblical depth and true maturity— a true grasp on the depth of our shared sinfulness and the breadth of God's grace—is a big part of the problem. Study of the Bible is at an all-time low. How does one exhibit grace when one has no idea what grace really is? Without knowledge of God's Word, it's hard to know how to react in "uncomfortable" situations. Couple this with the "culture war" mentality of so many highly visible ministries, and it's natural that most believers would have issues in dealing with those who struggle.

That is the way things seem to me. It may not be that way everywhere, but I suspect it's more common than you might think. Let's stay in touch.

Best Regards,

Ben

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Related Topics:HomosexualitySex
Posted: November 25, 2013

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Displaying 3–7 of 8 comments

Rod Hewitt

November 29, 2013  4:04am

Yes God Loves the sinner,he Hates the Sin.Are we to say Gods Love and Justice for us are wrong?Who are we to dare question Gods Love for us?He does Not delight in the Death of Sinners he calls all to Repentance through his Son Jesus. Can one be a Gay or Lesbian Christian?Answer to that is,for some on first entering the New Life in Christ,it happens Immediately that we can follow in Christs footsteps,others it may take sometime to realise what is going on in their New Life,we Must,through the Power of the Holy Spirit allow him to work in our lives to cleanse us from within,turn from sin and not go back,hence the word Repentance,turn away from sin the wilful sin,what is intended,we are forgiven our past sins and strive to live more each day for God.It is an Abomination to God to be gay, He created One Man,one Woman not same sex,.Remember allow His spirit to work in you he will set you free,I still pray for my cleansing as an ordinary person to live more like Jesus.God really LOVES You

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richard brooks

November 26, 2013  5:20pm

our King is looking for men and women who will love sacrificially, and who are willing to fight in the trenches, not just the pews! We are at war and the american church has retreated, to get fat, lazy, and as the church in laodicea we have become lukewarm. Jesus stated in order, we are to heal the sick, CAST OUT DEMONS, and preach the good news. But i think most americans think demons only exist in africa or the gospels. most homosexual attraction is based in, abuse and the demonic. this is why they still struggle after coming to the cross. These poor souls need deliverance and healing! MGod is looking for men who are willing to cast them out! I know from experience. he has cast out of me 31 demons to date, and delivered me powerfully from this bondage! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yCyp1TpBBAE&sns=em

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Justin Davis

November 26, 2013  4:00pm

I found the both the original article and this exchange to be disappointing. I'll show my cards by sharing that I am a Christian, Baptist, who is also gay. I am currently in divinity school seeking ordination. The issue with both the original article and this exchange is that they present only one perspective on same-sex attracted (gay or lesbian) Christians. Not everyone who is Christian and same sex attracted struggles in darkness. Nor do most or any gay or lesbian people I know, let alone Christians, place their identity in their sexual orientation. I believe that is a trope used to dehumanize gay and lesbian persons to people largely unaware of the issues that we face. I encourage anyone to seek out resources that go beyond their own perspectives. I highly recommend Torn: Rescuing the Gospel from the Gays-vs.Christians Debate by Justin Lee. It is humble, honest, and shares a graceful approach to people on all sides of the issues surrounding LGBT Christians.

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lee carlton

November 26, 2013  3:25pm

I disagree with both of these writers. There is everything to be gained in coming out as a honest person before God and others. The church simply cannot teach people that it the right thing to be honest and then to punish/shame people for being honest. How else can we be authentic in coming to God except; "Just as I am?" The church also has an obligation to search it's own heart and soul as well as being objective in an examination of the scriptures within their cultural context. After all the Good Book has a lot more to say about the misuse of heterosexual sex than about the misuse of homosexual sex. I just do not find a blanket condemnation of homosexual love anywhere in the scripture and definately not from Jesus. Sex in the service of idolatry is the subject of the scriptures, and it is idolatry which is the abomination [not the sexual orientation or the gender of the idolater] being condemned. Blind guide:Stop placing stumbling blocks in front of the people Jesus bled and died for

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Gary Nielsen

November 26, 2013  2:47pm

This exchange is really helpful! Having worked with Stan several years ago when he has the speaker at a retreat on this topic for graduate students, I am not surprised by his humility and grace. And Ben is so on target in his critique of the church as in general not being helpful (or worse). I also, like Bill Cowan above, am a very straight older Christian man, who is thankful for having my eyes opened at least a bit to the reality of life for those who struggle with same-sex attraction. May God help us...the way we treat homosexuals shows how little we really know of his love and grace.

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