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Key Bible Verse: Women are not independent of men, and men are not independent of women (1 Corinthians 11:11). Bonus Reading: Proverbs 15:31–32; 19:20; 20:5

Barbara and I committed early in our marriage to make all decisions together. Only if we come to an honest yet unshakable disagreement do I make the decision as head of the house. I mention this because many men use their headship as a sort of club to force their wives to submit.

Just because Barbara says something once, I've learned, doesn't mean she feels I've heard her. I may need to hear her repeatedly and understand the emotional power behind her words—especially when she disagrees with my decision. Only if she knows I understand her, will she be ready to follow it.

We faced a decision about our daughter's gymnastics involvement. I maintained we should move her out of it. Barbara recalls, "I knew intuitively Dennis was right, but I loved watching Rebecca perform. She was built for gymnastics and loved it. I didn't want her to grow up resenting us for forcing her to quit. I needed to share with Dennis how I felt. It took time before I felt I'd adequately expressed that." Barbara's cautions were sound. As husbands we err in decision making when we don't really take our wife's opinion into account.

—Dennis Rainey in Moments Together for Intimacy

My Response: How well do I listen before I make decisions? Would my wife agree?

Thought to Apply: A marriage in which each partner brings ideas and approaches—even disagreements—will build on the best both have to offer. —Neil Clark Warren

Adapted from Moments Together for Intimacy (Regal, 2003) by permission.

Prayer for the Week

Thank you, God, for granting me a life partner. Help us to realize the oneness You intended for us—in spirit as well as in body.

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