When you have a major fight with your spouse, you usually: [all that apply]
Blame your partner
Take the blame
Insist on talking until you've resolve the issue
Just hope it blows over
Seek help and counsel from your pastor
Feel guilty
Feel like you're right
Seek help and counsel from a friend
Angrily leave the house to cool off
Watch as she leaves the house to cool off
Give her the silent treatment
Tell her she acts just like her mother
Sleep on the couch
Wonder why you even married her
End up saying your sorry
Expect her to admit she's sorry
End up buying her flowers
Setting Dreams Free Theme of the Week: How Mutual? Thursday, May 13, 2004
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Men of IntegrityMay/June 2004Setting Dreams FreeTheme of the Week: How Mutual?Thursday, May 1373
Key Bible Verse: Don't think only of your own good. Think of other Christians and what is best for them (1 Corinthians 10:24). Bonus Reading:Philippians 2:3–4
"It's all about me," a ministry leader admitted to me and a few others. He was describing his marriage. His words really bothered me because, underneath them, I heard God's voice: "Your life matches this description, too, Jeff. What are you going to do about it?"
Erin wanted to become a nurse and had begun pre-nursing studies before our marriage. The slide began innocently enough. After my job took me out of state, we'd married, and she'd left school behind. Where we lived, our work and friends, our proximity to other family, our parenting responsibilities, our transportation situation—had all become basically about me.
So I sat down with Erin for a let's-make-this-not-about-me-anymore discussion, and invited her to take her dreams off hold. It hasn't proved a burden. Now—five years later—Erin's a registered nurse. It's who she is. And I'm delighted!
Your wife's dream might be about a livelihood, or her special contribution to your marriage, or her unique contribution to the world. But how can a man truly serve his wife if he lets her settle for anything less in life than what's written on her heart to become?
—Jeffrey Leever in Colorado
My Response: Am I aware of my wife's dreams? How am I helping her realize them?
Thought to Apply: Married love is hard work, because it requires me to constantly think of my spouse first instead of myself.
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