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Key Bible Verse: His father … had never disciplined him … even by asking, "What are you doing?" (1 Kings 1:6). Bonus Reading:1 Samuel 2:12-17,22-34;3:11-14

When the drug movement spread through Johnson City, my friend Dave was one of the men who swapped stories in the coffee shop and barbershop about which kids had recently been picked up for drug possession. They laughed about one teen, on an LSD trip, found wandering around the city park chasing imaginary lions. Though the school administration was trying to deal with the problem, most fathers in the community, Dave included, never stopped to consider that their son or daughter might be involved.

Dave, a real-estate agent, was a good provider and disciplinarian for the family. But perhaps he was too busy at work or didn't know how to deal with the issues confronting his son, John. After all, drugs weren't around when he was growing up. Dave never asked John about the drug situation at school.

It was three years after John started using drugs regularly that Dave found out his son was addicted to cocaine! If Dave had sought to know his son's difficulties and the struggles with self-identity that led him into the drug culture, it might have saved 15 years of John's life—the time it took him to kick the drug habit.

—Ken Canfield in The 7 Secrets of Effective Fathers

My Response: Have I just assumed my kids are "clean"? Can I afford to?

Thought to Apply: A father ought to help his son form the habit of doing right on his own initiative, rather than because he's afraid of some serious consequence.—TERENCE

Adapted from The 7 Secrets of Effective Fathers (Tyndale, 1992) by permission.

Copyright © 2005 by the author or Christianity Today International/Men of Integrity magazine.Click here for reprint information on Men of Integrity.

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Prayer for the Week

Lord, help me to stay connected with the children you've entrusted to me, and to steer them away from the dangers they'll encounter.

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