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Home > Men > Buried Feelings > Shamefully Softhearted


Shamefully Softhearted
Theme of the Week: Buried Feelings
Wednesday, August 17, 2005



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Key Bible Verse: He will not crush those who are weak or quench the smallest hope (Isaiah 42:3). Bonus Reading: Galatians 5:14-15

I remember times when my father and a few of his men friends went to minor league hockey games and invited me along. At the ticket booth, they'd ask for seats behind whatever goal the visiting team would defend for two of the game's three periods. It seemed to me that they sought these seats so they could taunt the visiting goaltender and distract him from his game.

I had no enthusiasm for the merciless baiting of the man in pads. The catcalls of the crowd that repelled me were part of the game, people said. But I often felt sick inside, identifying with what I saw as total humiliation of a lonely man on the ice far from home. Taking the ridicule personally, I yearned to stand up and shout, "Stop it! The man is doing his best. Get off his back!"

But as I relive those moments, I'm fascinated by how hard I worked to conceal those embarrassing feelings of sympathy. I never told anyone. For me, the only choice was to fake it, to join in expressing a passion I didn't feel. Why? I suspect it was a growing realization that boys and men weren't supposed to deal in sentiment, to worry about how an opponent might feel.

—Gordon MacDonald in When Men Think Private Thoughts

My Response: What biblical standards am I allowing others around me to trump?

Thought to Apply: Never apologize for showing feelings. Remember that when you do, you apologize for the truth. —BENJAMIN DISRAELI (British prime minister)

Adapted from When Men Think Private Thoughts (Nelson, 1996) by permission.



0Prayer for the Week

Thank You, Lord, for making me a complete person. Help me to embrace every part of my makeup that You created.



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