Trick Question?
Theme of the Week: How to Spell Love with Your Wife
Sunday, February 11, 2007
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Who Said It…Clarence Shuler
Clarence Shuler and his wife, Brenda, lead marriage and diversity seminars through Building Lasting Relationships, Inc., which Clarence founded. They are also members of Dennis Rainey's FamilyLife Marriage Speaker Team.
Clarence, the first African American to play for and co-captain a Moody Bible Institute basketball team, played basketball overseas with Sports Ambassadors. These days he plays tennis, helps his three teenage daughters with their sports, and writes books. What He Said…Trick Question?
During our first year of marriage, I usually had my "quiet time" watching ESPN. One night, Brenda came out of the bedroom and asked if I was watching TV.
Well, the TV was on, and I was lying on the sofa facing in that direction. But Brenda has her master's degree and is much smarter than I am, so I pondered her question for a few seconds. But I didn't have a clue as to what was on her mind, and had no one to teach me this foreign language. So I said, "Yes, I'm watching TV."
She didn't get mad. She simply turned around and went back into the bedroom. But somehow I felt that I'd given her a wrong answer.
After three years of doing marriage seminars, I realized that she hadn't really been asking me if I was watching TV. She'd actually been asking several questions: (1) Can we talk? (2) When are you coming to bed? (3) Is this show important to you? What she was really saying was, "I need some attention."
Adapted from Your Wife Can Be Your Best Friend (Moody, 2000) by permission.
Copyright © 2007 by the author or Christianity Today International/Men of Integrity magazine. Click here for reprint information on Men of Integrity. 1 of 1
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Lord, may my love for You and for my mate drive me to replace self-centeredness with attentiveness, thoughtfulness, and serving.
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