Confrontation Deflation
Theme of the Week: Resolving Marriage Discord
Emerson Eggerichs
Friday, May 16, 2008
 1 of 1
Key Bible Verse: Gently teach those who oppose the truth. Perhaps God will change those people's hearts (2 Timothy 2:25).Bonus Reading: Proverbs 15:1,18
A man voiced discontent to me about the way his wife would verbally malign him. As a man's man, he tended to stonewall during her flare-ups, which sent her through the roof.
I coached him to approach her differently to discover the benevolent power he possessed over the spirit of his wife. This husband admitted that trying my suggestion went against his natural grain, but he agreed to give it a try.
The next time she became disgruntled and vexed about something trivial, he stopped her and gently but firmly told her, "Look, you can continue to emasculate me or you can join me on the couch where we can sit down and pray over this." Like air out of a balloon, all the negativity drained from her. She stopped her ranting, turned, headed for the couch, sat down, bowed her head, and put her hand out for him to hold.
In utter disbelief, he reported the results. "Look," I told him, "women may seem to be out of control or it may appear they're trying to control you, but their real motive is to connect in love. When a wife feels true love coming toward her, she immediately and respectfully aligns herself with the spirit of her husband. Mission accomplished."
—Emerson Eggerichs in Love and Respect
My Response: I'll ask God to help me exercise my "benevolent power" when our marriage hits a rough patch.
Thought to Apply: I first learned the concepts of non-violence in my marriage.—Mohandas Gandhi (Indian nationalist)
Adapted from Love and Respect (Integrity, 2004) by permission.
Copyright © 2008 by the author or Christianity Today International/Men of Integrity magazine.
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Lord, help me take the initiative in repairing any damaged relationships in my marriage.
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