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Key Bible Verse: Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ (Ephesians 5:21). Bonus Reading: Ephesians 5:25–30

McKenzie worries a lot—about finances, friendships, and the safety of her kids. Sometimes her stomach hurts and she can't sleep. "Stop worrying so much," Greg insists. "You're making yourself sick."

"If I don't worry about things, who will?" she retorts. "You act like nothing bothers you. At least I have a heart."

"Well, I'd rather be tough than fall apart whenever things don't go just right," Greg shouts. McKenzie rushes out of the room, slamming the door behind her.

Men are like turtles. When stress rains down, it usually rolls right off their backs. And when it doesn't, it seems like weakness, so they often deny its reality. Women are like sponges. When stress rains down, it sinks into their pores and saturates them. They have a hard time squeezing themselves out, holding on to stress even when they'd rather let it go.

Both tend to overcompensate. If a husband doesn't notice problems or does nothing about them, his wife feels she must make up for his inattention. Seeing how stressed she is, he becomes even more turtle-like to show her there's nothing to worry about. She sees his reaction as rejection or abandonment; and he sees hers as hysterical over-emotionality. But they just confirm that he's a turtle and she's a sponge.

—Steve Stephens in Lost in Translation

Lost in Translation (Multnomah, 2007); {33-36}

My Response: What tendencies have I faulted my wife for that may be a built-in aspect of her God-given femininity?

Copyright © 2009 by the author or Christianity Today International/Men of Integrity magazine.
Click here for reprint information on Men of Integrity.

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Prayer for the Week

Help me, Lord, to build a strong marriage by appreciating and benefitting from the ways I and my wife are different by your good design.

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