I grew up in something of a jet-set family, where divorce ruled. Everybody got divorced. Add to that my family's raging alcoholism and explosive anger, and maybe you can see why divorce was epidemic, and how I grew up convinced that my life wouldn't feature a lasting marriage.
That belief got a major makeover after a bunch of terrific couples put their arms around me in an awesome Southern California church of 110 people. For the first time in my life, I saw couples that had been married for 10, 15, 20, and even 30 or more years. During five years in that church, I never saw a single couple break up. That totally changed my frame of reference. For the first time, I thought, I could really have a lasting marriage. That could be my future.
My wife, Carol, and I just celebrated our 30th anniversary. I couldn't imagine this 30 years ago.
The couples in that church liberated me from the expectation that my past background was going to determine my future relationships.
Hope will do that for you. Hope liberates from past failures, from bitterness, from anger, from insecurity, and from the kind of low expectations that keep people chained to the past.