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Hey Dad,

Know what? We men are jerks. Notice I included myself in the jerk category. I was vividly reminded of our jerkiness earlier this week when I did an hour-long radio interview to discuss "Lies Moms Believe." The interview went nicely, but then we took a couple of calls from the radio audience.

"My husband insists that I keep a spotless house," the caller started. "I have several young children, but he doesn't understand why I can't keep the house immaculate."

Using my best radio voice, I offered some "right" advice. I could hear the emotion in her voice and knew she was on the verge of tears. The interviewer sensed it too and asked the young mom, "So what does your husband say when you talk to him about it?"

"He says his mother used to keep a clean house so why can't I?" I could hear the hurt in her answer. I wanted to smack him … hard.

A few minutes later another mom called in to ask about her husband who didn't seem to want to be intimate with her. Again, her voice was choked with tears. "I just don't understand," she repeated several times.

I tried to offer some more "right" advice.

On the drive home, I had a pit in my stomach. Now, I know I only heard part of the story, but inside I felt ashamed that I was a husband and "related" to them. What made it worse is that I'm probably a lot more like those guys than I'd like to admit.

You know, Dad, we promised our wife that we would honor, protect, and cherish her forever. Yet, like those husbands whose wives called in, we act like jerks, caring more about a clean house than them. We roll our eyes and sigh when they get overwhelmed and tear up, and replace gentle caresses and touches with harshness and indifference. When they need us the most, we let them down, forcing them to call a complete stranger on some radio program in search of hope.

Dad, we have some work to do. You and I both know the areas we need to address. Let's ask God to forgive us for the past and to give us the determination to love our wives when they cry, feel overwhelmed, need us to hold them, need to talk deeply, spend intimate time with them, or discuss things that don't seem very important to us.

Why? Because they need us.

You 'da dad!

© Copyright 2005 Todd Wilson. Used by permission.

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