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Powerful Insights into These Passionate Bonds
There's no question we love all of our children in unique ways. But there's also no question that we share something special, something deeper with our children of the same sex. The connection between dads and sons, moms and daughters is more complex and intimate than any other. These bonds are perhaps the most influential we ever experience—both as mothers and fathers and as the daughters and sons of our own parents. As you celebrate Mother's Day and Father's Day in the coming weeks, we invite you to reflect on these distinctive relationships in your own life.

Imagine you're driving in the country with your teenage son. You pull the car over to the side of a deserted dirt road and turn off the ignition. "Dad, what's going on?" your son asks. You dangle the car keys in front of his face. "Son," you say, "why don't we trade places?"

Your son gets a look on his face—elation combined with fear. He gets behind the wheel, slips the car into gear, and both of your hearts race as you spin down the road.

You have communicated that you trust him with your car—not to mention your very life!

It's a father's unique privilege to bring his son through various rites of passage. Maybe it's the Saturday morning you get him up early to go out to breakfast with you and your adult friends. Maybe it's the first time you let him stay home alone while you and your wife go out of town overnight. Or the first time you trust him with your credit card or your electric razor.

These are big moments for all boys, and as fathers we need to be there to share them. I suppose a driver's ed instructor could teach him to drive just as well. Another dad in the neighborhood could help him check the oil in the car or change his first tire. But there's something different, something special about a boy learning these things from his father.

A successful transition from boyhood to manhood calls for a father who will tap into his son's desire to understand the world, harness his boy's innate drive to compete, make the most of his son's creativity, and help his son develop discernment. Since we fathers were once boys ourselves, these essential traits don't surprise us. But they are a reminder of how fathers can cultivate character in our sons. Your role isn't just important to your son's development into a man of God, it's essential.

Boys need a strong sense of curiosity. They need to develop their investigative capacities. The world is full of fascinating puzzles just waiting to be explored. You can help your son plumb the meaning of these puzzles by asking questions that will launch him on a journey of finding the truth at his own pace and in his own way. Ask him why the moon has phases, why moss grows on the north side of a tree or why manhole covers are round. It's not the questions themselves that build his character, but the wonderment and willingness to ask why that will help mold him into a man of depth.

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