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Home > Momsense > Kids & Culture > Your Child's World


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Body Wars
Culture tells our daughters they're fat, ugly, and unlovable. Here are 5 ways to defeat those lies and make your child feel as beautiful as she is.
By Kathleen P. Atwell



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My friend Barb recently asked her daughter what she wanted for her high-school graduation gift. Positive that Tessa would ask for something extravagant—a diamond ring, a laptop computer, or a trip to the ocean—Barb braced herself.

But she wasn't at all prepared for Tessa's request: "I want my breasts enlarged!"

Positive that Tessa would ask for something extravagant, Barb braced herself.

Barb couldn't believe what she heard. Tessa had a lovely figure. Her weight was normal; she was healthy and beautiful. Recently crowned Homecoming Queen, Tessa was a popular honor-roll student. Why would she even consider cosmetic surgery?

Tessa is not alone. According to a recent poll in United Kingdom—based teen magazine Bliss, only one-tenth of the girls polled were happy with their bodies, and 40 percent have considered plastic surgery. The magazine's editor, Chantelle Horton, considers the poll results a "21st-century tragedy."

The pressure to have a perfect body is strong. Photographers touch up photos of celebrities and models, leading us to believe that body perfection is attainable. Television reality shows like Extreme Makeover and MTV's I Want a Famous Face encourage teens to pursue cosmetic surgery to look like their favorite movie stars or trade their "imperfections" for flawless features.

But it's all in good fun, right? Think again. The underlying message boldly sent through media is strong: Your body is not good enough.

What's a parent to do? Breaking through cultural lies is one of the toughest parenting jobs. How can you convince your teen she is a beautiful child of God when society tells her she doesn't measure up? Don't despair. You can make a difference.

1. Be informed.

Pretending the problem doesn't exist won't protect your child. Barb was shocked to learn that her daughter would consider plastic surgery. But after discussing the issue with Tessa, she learned that a few of her daughter's peers had undergone cosmetic procedures. Heather, president of their senior graduating class, had lip augmentation with her mother, who scheduled her daughter's procedure to coincide with her own appointment.

The American Society of Plastic Surgeons reports that the most popular cosmetic surgery among teens is rhinoplasty—in casual terms, "a nose job." Liposuction and breast augmentation were also high on the list. According to the American Society for Aesthetic Plastic Surgery, the number of females 18 and younger receiving breast implants nearly tripled from 2002 to 2003. The teens cited pressure from boys who expect their girlfriends to look like celebrities and a desire to be liked and accepted as reasons for having surgery. Cosmetic surgery is rapidly becoming an acceptable method of improving image.



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