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I don't like feeling stuck—especially when I have little control over the circumstances. Like when I'm stuck in rush-hour traffic. Or stuck in a long, slow line at the Department of Motor Vehicles. Or stuck at the airport, waiting for a delayed flight to take off.

Recently, I was stuck in a hospital bed, anchored by three IVs and waiting several interminably long days for the right team of doctors to assemble to do the surgery I needed.

"How did you cope?" a friend asked when I finally came home two weeks later.

The answer seems simple, yet frustrating. When we're stuck like that, we might not like it, but we cope, because we have no other choice. We endure. Persevere. These are internal skills we have plenty of opportunities to grow and practice throughout our lives.

As a child, I used to get stuck in boredom or impatience on a long car ride, and my mother always told me to "use my inner resources." Her words irritated me then, but I think she meant "learn to endure."

In the season of raising three preschoolers, I found myself stuck fairly regularly.

Stuck at home with a new baby or a sick child.

Stuck in a gray-cloud world on an endless, no-school snow day.

Stuck in that rush-hour traffic with a preschooler whining, "Mommy, I'm hungry. Mommy, can I have some more juice? Mommy, I have to go poop." When I've run out of crackers and juice and I don't have a port-a-potty in the car, I'm just plain stuck. And I have to cope with the circumstances.

When stuck at home with preschoolers, I tried to follow the common suggestions about closing myself in the bathroom for a few minutes of alone time, or making a cup of tea or calling a friend. But all those external remedies didn't really "unstick" me on stuck days. The stuck circumstances were still there when I finished the tea or hung up the phone.

I remember a story I heard that made sense to me in those hectic days of mothering. A woman checked into a retreat center, and a nun, upon welcoming her, asked what brought her to the retreat center. What was her desire?

"I feel so dry and empty," the woman answered. "I need to get filled up."

"Hmm …," the wise nun mused. "You know that when the well runs dry, the farmer doesn't refill it. He digs deeper."

When I'm empty and stuck, I won't always find a simple solution in the world around me. Sometimes, I simply need to dig deeper in my soul … to that place where God indwells me … and trust his promises that remind me my "stuckness" isn't permanent. And to understand that the way it is now is not the way it will always be. That on a dark and cloudy day, the sun still shines behind the clouds and will come out again. And maybe most importantly, that there's something for me to gain in these stuck places that will strengthen me for the rest of life's journey.

My recent hospital experience presented one of my most difficult challenges ever, but I know that persevering through all the other stuck places in my life helped me endure this one. And it reminded me once again that God intends it for us to grow, even in our most difficult moments.

Carol Kuykendall is a Consulting Editor for MomSense magazine and the author of Five-Star Families and co-author of What Every Mom Needs, available in the MOPShop.

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