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Q: How do I help my children process tragic news? It seems there is always so much TV and newspaper coverage of terrible events locally and worldwide. No matter how hard I try to shield my kids from seeing these catastrophic images, bad news is everywhere.

A: Good question! It's one most every parent worries about. However, we're going to start with a bit of a push-back question. If you're talking about preschoolers, why aren't you able to shield them from these catastrophic images? Most of what you're probably talking about are the tragic images your kids are viewing on television. We believe you must be more diligent about having the TV set under close scrutiny when your preschoolers are viewing it.

Kids should have a pretty tight limit of daily television, or video viewing (depending on the age, somewhere around an hour maximum in a day). And the TV should only be on for kids' programs that are engaging and positive. If that's not what's on the TV, turn the television off. If you're afraid of missing a program, invest the money in a DVR (digital video recorder) and record your shows to watch during your kids' bedtime, naptime or structured playtime. There's just no good way to explain away some things on TV to a very little person.

Here's another important concept to consider about tragic events that professionals discovered around both the Oklahoma City bombings and 9/11. Children don't understand that continual news coverage of the same event is only about one event. Every time an image is replayed, they think it's happening over and over again. As a result, they get continuously bombarded. They don't understand they're seeing a tape of the same thing. So, keep them from being exposed.

But when they do happen to see something that's tragic, say whatever is age-appropriate to make sense of the reality. If there's a clip of violence, or police are shown apprehending someone, say, "Yes, you're right. That's a mean man, but the good guys are stopping him from being mean." Or, "Yes, that was an accident. But it will be OK." Then, hug them and move on to something else. Preschoolers need to know bad things are not bigger than Mom or Dad and that they're safe and secure with their parents.

Always remember that the power is in the connection with you. If you connect with them, that should be bigger than whatever they saw, and their anxiety should go away. If not, then you may have an anxious child, and that's a different problem. Love your kids and then pray with them for the people they saw injured on the TV or in the newspaper. If they saw an accident, say, "Let's ask God to help them feel better."

The bottom line is that you need to be diligent about protecting what your kids watch on TV. And when that's impossible, normalize the event your children see so they understand sometimes accidents happen or people can act mean, but everything is still OK in their world.

Drs. Cloud and Townsend are counselors and the authors of many books—including Raising Great Kids, Boundaries, and Mom Factor—as well as the hosts of the syndicated national radio program "New Life Live." You can experience the wit, wisdom and understanding of Dr. Cloud and Dr. Townsend weekly through the Monday Night Solutions Tape Club. Each week you will receive an exceptional live audio recording by the doctors mailed to your home. Their biblical solutions for relationships and life's challenges will help you invest in the future of those you love, so enroll today! For more information or for a complete list of their extensive resources and speaking engagements, call (800) 676-HOPE or visit their Web site at www.cloudtownsend.com.

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