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Mr. Mom, a hit movie in the early eighties, depicts a freshly unemployed Michael Keaton struggling to adapt to being a full-time dad. He tries to be a substitute mom, and it isn't until the end of the movie that he gets it—he can still be a dad.

Fathers and mothers do not parent alike, writes Dr. Bob Frank in Equal Balanced Parenting (Golden). Agrees Eric: "My parents have noticed that I am not mothering the children, I'm fathering them."

In fact, studies are finding that children who have increased time with their fathers have numerous advantages chiefly because of the way a father interacts. One study from the Center for Successful Fathering in Austin, Texas, cites that when a father is an active participant in parenting, children benefit with higher grades, greater ambition, fewer anxiety disorders, and a reduced risk of delinquency or teen pregnancy.

Another study found children with an actively involved father score higher on verbal skills and academic achievement.

Working moms tend to blend both the "breadwinner" role with more traditional mothering activities such as helping with dinner, bathing the children, and putting them to bed. Fathers do most of the same household activities as stay-at-home moms, but still assume traditional responsibility for maintenance tasks such as yard work and fixing appliances.

Peter Baylies, founder of the newsletter At-Home Dad, splits household chores with his schoolteacher wife. "We share cooking every other week. Dad may still be changing the oil in the car but he's doing diapers too. Mom still isn't changing the oil, however," he notes.

What impact does role reversal have on a marriage? Marital contentment with these reversed roles has much to do with why the couple chose this arrangement. If both partners choose their role, it can enhance love and commitment, eliminate stresses of juggling daycare, and foster a supportive bond. But if a couple has fallen into this arrangement by default (such as getting laid off), or the father does not establish a primary emotional bond with his children and takes less power in parent-child matters, the adjustment period can be quite difficult. In those situations, husbands run the risk of becoming secondary factors in a marriage, writes Daniel Colodner in Full-Time Dads magazine.

Eric and Jody claim this arrangement works beautifully for them. "It's proven to be a rocket booster—it was precisely the right thing for our marriage," says Eric. "Jody is happier at her job now, knowing I'm with the kids. I love watching her blossom. Being a full-time dad has only strengthened our marriage."

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