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Even though our bodies have been designed for sexual arousal and release, various factors may interfere with our ability to respond orgasmically. These reasons must be identified and corrected. Any difficulty or inability to reach orgasm after adequate sexual stimulation can be caused by our passivity or previous conditioning, by emotional or sexual trauma, or many possible medical factors.

How important is it for you to have orgasms? How do you know if you have ever had one? What happens when you are orgasmic? What if you have been trying and nothing seems to work? These are frequently asked questions that need to be answered as an introduction to releasing orgasmic potential.

First, the importance of orgasms is evident because rarely does a woman keep interested in sex if she is not orgasmic. Initially she will be excited and enjoy sex with her husband, but over time she will allow less and less sexual intensity to build and start having sex primarily for him. God designed our bodies to respond sexually, and Scripture teaches that men and women have sexual drives that can be fulfilled in marriage. Having sex for the other person falls short of the mutuality spouses can share together, as taught in 1 Corinthians 7.

How do you know if you've had an orgasm? You know if you have had one by understanding what happens when you do. Arousal builds to a certain intensity causing engorgement, or a building of sexual tension, in the genitals and throughout the body in general. The engorgement triggers the reflex of the orgasm. The orgasm reflex sets into motion contractions in the lower part of the vagina, as well as of the uterus. Think about sneezing: When we sneeze, engorgement in the nasal passages and tingling sensation precede the sneeze. The sneeze releases the build-up in these passages. The same thing happens with an orgasm: the tension build-up in the genitals is released and you feel relaxed and satisfied afterward.

What if you have been trying and nothing seems to work? Stop trying and follow some important steps toward releasing responsiveness. If you are a woman in search of an orgasm, you can find what you are seeking.

1. Obtain a medical evaluation. If something is wrong physically, all the efforts in the world will never produce an orgasm. Start with a hormonal evaluation. You may need to request that your physician have your estrogen, progesterone, total testosterone, and free testosterone levels measured. If you are menopausal, hormone replacement therapy may prove beneficial. If you are on a birth-control pill that is high in progestins, which suppress sexual desire and response, you should switch to a pill that is higher in estrogen and androgen (testosterone) activity. An estrogen cream inserted into the vagina with an applicator will increase lubrication and enhance sensation. A 1 percent testosterone cream applied on the outside genitals around the clitoris will increase both desire and responsiveness. Your physician will have to order and manage these possibilities.

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