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Husband Bashing
When I joined in on a gripe-fest about spouses, God taught me a lesson I'll never forget.
Rhonda Rizzo Webb | posted 9/12/2008
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Pulling the planks
I asked God for forgiveness and decided I wouldn't badmouth Jimmy anymore. And I took Jesus' advice to concentrate on my own "planks," which turned out to be a full-time job.
The Bible tells me to honor, respect, and love my husband. As I began to focus on those things, I discovered I didn't have time to worry about Jimmy's failures.
I also had to admit Jimmy's failures weren't ultimately my problem. They're between him and God—just as my failures are between God and me. While I can pray for Jimmy, if he's not the husband he should be, he ultimately must answer to God. Just as I must answer to God for how I treat my husband.
Not until I have sorted out my own sin can I lovingly speak the truth to Jimmy about his—and then only if God leads. I must pull the plank from my eye before picking at the speck in Jimmy's.
Part of me still wants to say, "Lord, if I don't point out his shortcomings, how will he ever change?" But surely the God of the Universe can reveal Jimmy's weaknesses to him without my help. I just have to trust God.
Whew! What a relief—to me and to Jimmy. No longer do I nag him about every little issue. And no longer do I whine about him to my friends.
Now, when the other girls are grumbling about their hubands, I just say, "I can't complain. I'm just grateful he puts up with me!"
Rhonda Rizzo Webb is author of Words Begin in Our Hearts: What God Says About What We Say (Moody). Visit Rhonda at www.rhondawebb.com.
Copyright © 2004 by the author or Christianity Today International/Marriage Partnership magazine. Click here for reprint information on Marriage Partnership.
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