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Forewarned is forearmed, and it's helpful to know what each decade may bring sexually. A tablespoonful of attention, a dash of appreciation, a cupful of communication, tossed lightly with creativity and a good sense of humor is a great recipe for "good lovin" in any decade.

This is the decade of lots of sex, and often. Many couples marry out of college or later in their twenties, and are "rarin' to go." They have time and no major responsibilities, such as children, to deal with. They're unencumbered, and everything about the relationship is still fresh.

That was Heather and Mark's experience. They were married right out of college. Heather's heart beat faster when Mark entered a room. She loved the smell of him, and felt her stomach flip-flop when he kissed her.

While it was difficult, they'd waited to have sex until after their wedding. At their wedding reception, all Mark could think about was, Tonight's the night!

And that's pretty much what he continued to think every night through this decade. That's when their differences began to surface. Soon, Mark felt as if he always wanted sex more often than Heather. His raging sex drive produced an unyielding longing for sex.

Heather, however, was satisfied with making love two to three times a week. "Is sex all you ever think about?" she'd ask him when his affections turned inevitably to foreplay. And often that foreplay turned into arguments about sexual frequency.

• Couples first notice libido differences, often creating pressure for the female and frustration for the male.
• While a man's sexual peak is during his late teens and early twenties, it can easily stay charged well into his late twenties. He feels driven by his body. Thus it's called a sex drive.

• As the twenties progress men become more able to slow down. That means they don't have to recite the Gettysburg Address to stave off an orgasm while they're waiting for you to climax. They're more ready to listen to what will pleasure you.

• Men can become aroused in 2 to 3 minutes (and sometimes 30 seconds!)—but women take 10 times as long. That's 20 to 30 minutes to become as aroused as her man. Marriage won't turn a Crock-Pot into a microwave! Remember, the first description of love in Corinthians 13 is, "Love is patient."
• You'll get further in the sexual department if every affectionate moment doesn't turn into a sexual overture.

• Talk to your spouse about sex! The wife needs to communicate where and when are her best times for sex, as well as what turns her on and what makes her climax. Communication will improve sex better than any book on technique. The biggest obstacle to good sex is silence.

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