Home > Marriage > Couple Counsel > "He Never Finishes Projects!"
"He Never Finishes Projects!"
Also: "She Won't Help"
By Gary J. Oliver | posted 9/12/2008
 2 of 2
Each of you can pick one of the minus items from your partner's list that would be the easiest and least painful for you to do. Resolve to work on that one for the next week—regardless of what your spouse chooses to do. Without exception, the hundreds of couples I've had do this exercise have discovered that expanding their definitions of what they thought their responsibilities "should" be was not nearly as painful—and actually much more positive than they could have imagined.
Another suggestion is for you both to make a list of chores that need to be done. Now you both can track who does what over a two-week period. If you're doing everything on the list, it will be obvious for her to see.
Gary J. Oliver, Ph.D., co-author of Mad About Us: Moving from Anger to Intimacy with Your Mate (Bethany House), is executive director of The Center for Relationship Enrichment at John Brown University. www.liferelationships.com
Copyright © 2008 by the author or Christianity Today International/Marriage Partnership magazine. Click here for reprint information on Marriage Partnership.
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