From left: Noah Henson (guitars), Lester Estelle (drums), Rob Beckley (vocals, far back), Kalel (bass)

Pillar's new CD, Where Do We Go From Here, asks a vital question. It's a reference not only to the band's short-lived mainstream experience—Geffen (Blink 182, The Roots, The Cure) had signed Pillar, only to give them the cold shoulder and then drop them from the label—but also to more personal issues for the band, particularly frontman Rob Beckley. Now back with Flicker Records, Pillar is rocking louder than ever, but they're also making important statements—including taking a stand against Internet pornography. Beckley, who struggled with a porn problem not so long ago, is now encouraging others to seek help. Christian Music Today recently sat down with Beckley to discuss the band's crusade to help guys deal with their "dirty little secret."

Your new album is about being pulled in different directions by people who always tell you who to be or what to do. Is that your story, or is it meant to help those who are going through this?

Rob Beckley: Both. A lot of the themes in this record are a direct response to personal events, but we're also telling people, "Be who you're called to be." Many times we're going to fall short of earthly expectations, but we're ultimately accountable to God. God has different expectations of me than he does for someone like Bill Gaither, or somebody who has a different view of how to reach people. But we're all told to go out and reach people.

Can you really "reach people" from the stage in a concert? Or does real "reaching" happen one-on-one?

Beckley: The band is made up of four individuals. Our individual calling is to bring the gospel to people. We can't really minister to people from stage, especially if they don't want to hear it. Our goal each night is to earn respect from people in the crowd to the point where they'll inquire about our music, talk to us after the show, and ask us questions. So what comes first? Obviously, it's Christ. But when we're a band on stage, we're trying to earn the love and respect of people, to create an environment where God can move.

There's always going to be somebody who thinks we're doing it wrong. We recently received an e-mail from a guy who was really disappointed because, out of five bands on stage, nobody really talked about God. You could tell the guy was pretty bitter. He said he needed Christian music to be edified, and he needs us to speak about God to be edified. But to me, looking anywhere other than God, the Word, and fellowship in your own church is wrong. We're not out there to feed.

Are you afraid people see Christian music as gospel? Isn't that a dangerous mentality?

Beckley: Definitely. I told him, "Man, if you want Christian music to edify you, you're missing out on so much." That's a huge problem within the church: lack of discipline in studying. You have to approach things for yourself. You can't just listen to Pillar or Relient K and be edified. We're not theologians. We're not any type of authority on the Word of God. There are people that have the misperception that as soon as we get on the bus on the way to our next show, we read our Bibles 24/7. Our calling is to be musicians, and music is what you get when you come to see us.

What's the story behind the new song, "Dirty Little Secrets"?

Beckley: We have a couple of friends in California that run a website called XXXChurch.com [a site that helps Christians break free from pornography]. When they first started, "Dirty Little Secrets" was one of their catchphrases. I love what they're doing. So we took that phrase and I wrote the lyrics with the stuff they do in mind.

So, what is the song about?

Buckley: Pornography addiction. The topic itself isn't talked about enough, and it's so admirable to take that stand. In my past, pornography was a big problem, and now as a band all of us have accountability software in our computers, which anybody can download from their website. The whole key in the topic of church and pornography addiction is accountability, man. Just being open to talk about it and say, "Man, I got 43 junk e-mails the other day. I was doing good deleting them, but I got to the last one and I opened it up and ended up looking at all these websites." Just be loving and say, "Let's ask God to forgive you for that and move on." It's a topic that needs to be talked about lovingly and forgivingly. A couple years ago at a Promise Keepers event, there was a call for all men that dabbled in pornography, whether Internet or magazines, in the last seven days, to raise their hands, and 80% of the men responded.

Why the openness?

Buckley: The only reason I feel so open to talk about it is that we've hidden it for so long. It's started to consume so many people. And being open is sometimes harder than being accountable. We can stay on top of each other and pray for each other. But being honest and open with someone is a completely different issue. I have that issue with my wife, telling her everything and being transparent about this problem.

Do Pillar fans relate to the issue of pornography, and if so, do they ask for advice?

Buckley: Definitely. We receive e-mails about it. We talk to our fans at shows. They come up to us and ask to talk to us in private. We feel like counselors sometimes. We're talking to some of these kids in a secluded backroom, and they break down and cry and tell us of their problem with pornography. It's tough to be in those situations. I'm not the best at talking to people about this, but it's ultimately very cool. I talked with this one couple one time who had problem with Internet pornography as a couple, and our song "Behind Closed Doors" helped them set the stage to be open and talk to us. We talked, and I got to pray with them. Those are the type of things that make this gig worthwhile.

Was pornography ever a big factor in your life?

Beckley: Yeah. That's the reason why I'm excited to work with the guys at XXXChurch, because of all that pornography did to me. Before I was a Christian, about six years ago, I was spending lots of money in strip clubs and adult entertainment. The big thing that pulled me out of this lifestyle was moving to a little town that didn't have anything to tempt me. When I used to live in the city environment, that was part of my lifestyle. Just spending a couple of hundred bucks a night on easy entertainment.

At that point, were you aware of the damage that it was inflicting upon you?

Buckley: No. I was completely blind to it. If you would've told me it was damaging me, I would have been like, "Whatever, dude. I'm having fun!" But moving definitely helped me, as did a did a book written by Steve Gallagher from Pure Life Ministries, in which he tells his story of how God gave him freedom from his addiction.

Let's change gears a bit. The original Fireproof (2002) got some attention from mainstream labels. How did that affect you?

Beckley: We didn't really think much about it. We were doing well, and everybody else just wanted to be a part of it.

Did Pillar's fans react to negatively when the band signed a mainstream record deal?

Beckley: We got a few e-mails, but they were mostly naïve people that didn't really know what was going on. Our fans are very supportive of what we've done.

Once you signed with Geffen, did you have any big dreams or aspirations?

Beckley: Not really. We just kept doing what we're doing. We're realistic. We signed a contract; we didn't sell our souls.

Describe your brief tenure with Geffen.

Beckley: There wasn't a tenure. They didn't even know we were there. We never had an A&R person assigned to us. They never even gave us a marketing plan. Our manager flew out there to meet with them, and they were used to having managers suck up to them, saying, "Please, don't drop us." Our manager said, "We want off your label because you're not doing anything." So they let us go, and it happened to be the best thing in the world. We became free agents, we got a new deal with Flicker that was good for everybody, a better record, and a lot of mainstream labels that still have interest in the band.

So, your major-label experience had more lows than highs?

Beckley: There were no highs and lows. It's just business. We play music. We did play a few radio shows with Korn, Taproot, and Sevendust. They thought we were really good. In the mainstream arena, you either suck or you don't. In Christian music, they don't really care if a band sucks or not, as long as they're "doing it for the Lord."

Are there many bands simply "doing it for the Lord" that aren't very good musically?

Beckley: Our bass player puts it like this: So many people compromise giving their all and doing things to the best of their ability because "they're doing it for the Lord." Our take on that is, "If it's for the Lord, shouldn't we give it everything we've got?"

For more about this hugely popular rock band, visit our artist page. In addition to their bio and discography, you'll find our review of their latest, Where Do We Go From Here. To listen to sound clips and buy Pillar's music, visit Christianbook.com.

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