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The Quantum Pope

Did the Pope really say that gay atheist priests are going to heaven if they follow him on Twitter? Perhaps modern physics can untangle this mystery.

I love quantum physics and I love popes.

While I was a physics major in college, I created a Facebook group called "Baptists Who Like Catholic Things." When Pope Francis began making some unusual headlines a few months ago, I did some quick calculations and realized that something quirky was happening in the fabric of Papal spacetime.

First, the Pope preached a homily in which he apparently said that atheists were redeemed – that everyone was redeemed, in fact. Then, headlines began popping up about the Pope's approval of gay priests. And at some point in all this, I was informed that I had gotten some time knocked off my purgatory sentence by following him on Twitter.

Thankfully, because of my science background, I was prepared for this barrage. I want to tell you how quantum physics put my mind to ease about the Pope.

The Observer Effect [and the atheist homily]

There's a recurring theme in the reports that follow each of these papal remarks: "Pope Francis is one of us (not one of them)." ...

March
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