I personally have never used steroids. Just so we're clear on that. I've never really been tempted. Partly because I've never played the kind of sports where steroids come into play. Partly because I have always had the kind of body type that would be magnificently steroid-resistant.
But what if some denomination or church-planting network had a lab that came up with Pastor-Enhancing Drugs?
Jimmy Mellado, who recently became the CEO of Compassion International, was an Olympic decathlete a few years ago. For that grueling competition, he was somewhat undersized, and I remember him talking about how hard it was to compete by the rules while knowing others were taking chemical shortcuts to get ahead. He went on to describe the wrong sorts of fuel that all of us can use at times to energize us in life; motivations that may catalyze impressive performance for a while but put our spiritual and emotional health at risk.
So here's a list of ecclesiastical performance enhancers ...