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Single Servings of Hospitality
6 singles share how they engage and entertain others
September 26, 2007
Chili and Doughnut Night
For the last two years I've organized a dinner club for a group of six friends. Once a month, we take turns cooking and catch up on each other's lives. Also, every once in a while I host a last-minute dinner; I send an e-mail invitation in the morning to a group of friends, and whoever can make it … great!
My favorite hostess activity is coming up in November: my Third Annual Chili and Doughnut Night. A friend's family introduced me to this strange combination while I was in college, and I decided to get my other friends in on the fun. We eat together and then share what God's been teaching each of us lately. The evening is a rich time of bonding with friends. I enjoy cooking and consider hospitality one of my spiritual gifts. As a single living in an apartment, I just have to be more creative in how I exercise that gift.
-Leigh
Howdy Neighbor
One of the best ways to meet new neighbors is to bring them a gift, usually food. I typically bake an apple pie for new people on the block and then ask them to return the pie plate with something in it. Often people invite me into their home to share some pie right then. And I've received numerous cookies in return. These goodie exchanges are a great way to show hospitality—and start a relationship. And people are usually surprised that I, a single guy, can bake an apple pie!
This tradition crosses cultures, too. I now live in the Dominican Republic, where people adore anything American I bring. Apple pies are a little more difficult to make here. The idea is to obey Jesus and reach out to others.
-John
The Ranch
Two years after the kick-off of the young-adult group in our rural corner of Virginia, three of us single women decided to rent a house together. We all wanted a place where others from the group could hang out anytime to have dinner or watch movies. Most important, we wanted people to feel comfortable there sharing their hearts and lives, praying and seeking the Lord together. We wanted our house to be a central part of our ministry with the young-adult group.
Eventually, we rented a 1950s ranch-style house from an elderly couple in our church. The house, situated in the middle of a working corn, soybean, and cattle farm with breathtaking views of the Blue Ridge Mountains, has a peaceful, restful atmosphere that soothes anyone who turns into our drive. We didn't wait long after moving in before our dream for the house began to take shape. "The Ranch," as we now affectionately call it, almost immediately became the social center of our group, with young men and women coming and going at all hours of the day. We frequently host community dinners, movie nights, small group meetings, and overnight guests because we have plenty of space, ample parking, and a "welcome anytime" attitude.
We're thankful God's allowing us to live in this amazing place for this season of our lives. And he's fulfilling the vision he gave us to have a real home, a welcoming refuge from the world to share with our friends and whomever else the Lord sees fit to bring to our doorstep.
-Laura
Ditching Our Pride
Establishing and maintaining community is trickier today that ever before because we can now communicate without getting together, thanks to devices such as cell phones, PDAs, and computers. I admit I don't have get-togethers at my studio apartment due to its small size. But I have planned several events at a park or a hall. Pulling all the details together takes time, but it's worth it.
Jesus went from household to household breaking bread and ministering to people, and we should do the same. We don't necessarily need to throw a large party at our house, but we can gather with some friends at a local restaurant or coffee shop. I often think of Hebrews 10:25, "Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching."
The Bible stresses the importance of setting aside our pride and simply fellowshipping with our brothers and sisters in Christ. If they're true children of God, they won't judge us by how big or small, how clean or dirty our place is, but they'll come to edify us as we edify them.
-Jeffrey
Meaningful Meals
I enjoy inviting people into my home and entertaining—a gift my mother definitely nourished. Planning events takes time and effort, but, once all the details come together, it's rewarding. I'm blessed to have a home big enough to host large parties, but some of my favorite times of fellowship are intimate meals at the table.
Since, at 37, I've never married and thus haven't benefited from a shower or wedding registry, I've received many household necessities from my parents and siblings. For the past ten years, when I've given them my wish list for my birthday and Christmas, I've included items I need for entertaining. And whenever I don't have something I need, I drive across town and "pillage" my parents' cupboard!
A number of years ago, for one of my most memorable gatherings, I invited my single girlfriends over for a Valentine's Day dinner celebrating Jesus, the Lover of our soul. I took the day off work and prepared a gourmet meal. We ate with silver and used good dishes and cloth napkins!For some of the women, the occasion was the first time in a long while that someone had waited on them. That terrific evening is a treasured memory.
-Susan
Contact Cards
I practice hospitality as a single person by opening up my home to small group studies each week. Not only does this allow us to fellowship together, but it keeps me accountable in my Christian walk. I'm able to foster community and various relationships by simply inviting people over to join us. I even created personal contact cards with Scripture on them that I offer folks if the Lord moves me to extend an invitation.
I also sometimes join forces with other singles to entertain by hosting potlucks with my coed study group and women's study group. Or I pass out a group sign-up for snacks each week so just one person isn't always supplying the goodies. Most important, I try to relax and have fun, enjoying the friends God brings to my door.
-Maria
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