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Home > Today's Christian > 1999 > November/December

Kids of the Kingdom
Wit and wackiness from the mouths of babes.
From our readers


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As our family was enjoying a delicious Thanksgiving dinner, my four-year-old granddaughter stopped chomping on her drumstick long enough to look at her mother, smile, and say, "I really like turkey on the cob."


—Mary Wanda Little
McConnelsville, Ohio



My eight-year-old daughter Sally was proudly explaining her science lesson to me. She learned that herbivores are plant eaters and carnivores are meat eaters.

I decided to test her knowledge by naming an animal and having her classify it.

"Tiger."

"Carnivore."

"Rabbit."

"Herbivore."

"Wolf."

"Carnivore."

"Anteater."

"Herbivore."

"An anteater's a herbivore?" I asked. "Don't they eat ants? Wouldn't that make them a carnivore?"

In an instant, Sally had it figured out. "There's not much meat on an ant."


—Amy L. Jenkins
Wauwatosa, Wisconsin



At a family birthday, my four-year-old grandson David noticed my white hair and that of his paternal grandfather.

"Why do you both have the same hair?" David asked.

"Perhaps your grandpa and I worry too much," I said, "or maybe we went to the same barber."

A few days later, I took David to the barber. Most of the shop's patrons had white hair, too.

After David hopped on the chair, the barber asked, "What can I do for you, young man?"

David replied, "I'll have a brown haircut, please."


—Thomas LaMance
Prewitt, New Mexico



On the ride home from church, I always ask my wife Mary what she thinks of my sermon. One Sunday, my six-year-old son Seth surprised me by saying I had preached a great sermon.

"What makes a sermon good?" I asked.

"It makes me sleepy like when Mommy reads me a story!"


—Bob Goolsby
Hindsboro, Illinois



While we were visiting friends in Mississippi, a terrific thunderstorm rolled through. My friend's four-year-old granddaughter was standing at the window—fascinated by the lightning.

After a few minutes she said in reverent awe, "I just saw heaven crack open and part of God's glory spilled out!"


—Donna Van Fossen
Bothell, Washington



I was teaching a geography lesson to my kindergarten class using a map of North America. I pointed to Canada, and asked the children what it was.

Five-year-old Savanna exclaimed, "I know! It's God!"

Astonished, I asked her why she thought that.

"Because," she said, remembering the pledge of allegiance we say every morning, "the United States is 'one nation under God.' "


—Suzanne Scott-Marzec
Moss Bluff, Louisiana



Our seven-year-old daughter Lacie is used to seeing her handyman father repair items around the house. On several occasions she has observed him spray WD-40 on rusty objects to lubricate them.

One day Lacie was attempting to put on a pair of jeans. However the snap was giving her trouble.





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