Just after Terri Beasley's* 46th birthday, her husband—a former pastor—left her. Their four children had grown and moved to another state. Suddenly, the house she'd raised her kids in was for sale, the church she'd helped start with her ex-husband was too awkward to visit, and her siblings were too far away to help.

She spent the next few months grieving the loss of everything close to her, questioning even the Christian faith on which she'd based most of her life. She packed up a lifetime of memories and familiar belongings and moved into a small apartment across town, feeling more and more unsettled about the future.

Then something happened. The group of women with whom she'd prayed regularly began praying for Terri. As they did, Terri's daily purpose was redefined. Her faith in God was restored, and her calling to serve others clear.

"That time in my life was not easy, but change never is," Terri says now, almost ten years later. "But I'll always be grateful because it made me realize how real God is, and how his purpose for me—to know him—never changes."

Terri's story reminds us that we can find deep joy and meaning in our middle years. And rather than moping through them, we can face midlife as an adventure, not a crisis, an opportunity to explore and grow and live in ways we never before imagined.

Dust off your map
Before venturing down any new road, it's important to pull out a map and understand your bearings. That's what Elyse Fitzpatrick, author of The Afternoon of Life: Finding Purpose and Joy in Midlife, decided to do once her children left home and began having their own families.

"So many people—women especially—invest themselves for so long but then don't know what to do when their children marry or their beauty fades or their parents become elderly," she says. "People in this part of life ask questions in the context of these issues and in how many days they might have left. I wanted to help others see that God's purpose in bringing us through this time is to glorify Himself and sanctify us."

With stories, humor, and biblical insights, Fitzpatrick urges us to reflect on where we want to be going and directs us continually to Scripture, which confirms the permanence of our lives with Christ. She says various moments in the afternoon of our earthly lives—readjusting a marriage, preparing for grandchildren, or caring for parents—are like signposts on a road. Each points us to the ultimate adventure in heaven. "God has been kind to us by force-feeding us with change: change of home, change of job, change of family situation. He's been kind in that he's reminding us that this really isn't our home, that we're supposed to be looking for a different one."

Steady your compass
Of course, knowing where we're going isn't always easy. We need a compass, a guide to keep us heading in the right direction. Like all the other times in our Christian lives, that requires being still in the presence of the Almighty, honest reflection with Him and others, regular Scripture study, and a healthy dose of humor.

"It takes grit and courage and prayer to face the other side of fifty and sixty and seventy," Karen O'Connor writes in Help, Lord! I'm Having a Senior Moment. "Most people want the last chapter of their lives on earth to be peaceful with more joy. Unfortunately, too many mourn the loss of their lives when they're still living. I say, let's not get stuck in the mourning; let's make music with what's left and enjoy what we've been given."

O'Connor, whose latest book is Help, Lord! I'm Having a Senior Moment—Again!, believes we won't take ourselves too seriously if we approach aging with laughter, cheerfulness, and lightheartedness.

Sharpen your knife
The next step in any adventure is to review our equipment. If the knife needs sharpening, sharpen it; that is, if our gifts are dull, we need to sharpen them so they can help us remain active, generous, and fully alive. But just how do we rediscover these, as well as a sense of wonder for the world around us or for the things that, before now, we didn't have time to appreciate?

Fitzpatrick says this is the time to volunteer, to learn a new skill (or return to an old one), and to give away our gifts. She suggests making a list of your gifts and abilities to see how you might use them in your local church or community, or finding a gap where young people might not have access to older Christians.

"Don't assume they don't want you there," she says. "Many are hungry for relationships, especially because we live in such a transient culture where people are often far from family, so this is a chance to become a surrogate parent, aunt, or friend. Serving other people helps you find your place."

Gather your crew
Terri Beasley today admits it was a crew of loyal friends who kept her going during a difficult time. Now she's committed to being the same kind of friend to others, whether it's helping neighbors or sewing costumes for kids at an after-school program. Relationships during midlife can be the most vulnerable and yet the most meaningful.

"You'd think that our time of life would mark the renewal of relationships. But statistics show that isn't the case," Fitzpatrick writes. "The highest incidence of divorce occurs among people ages 40 to 54. … I don't think marriages deteriorate just because we enter our fourth decade. We've been too busy with soccer practice and birthday parties to notice the erosion that's been eating away at the foundations of our life together."

In marriage and in singleness, midlife is a time to ask ourselves hard questions: What first brought us together? How can we grow together? What choices can I make now so I don't live with regrets? When I'm 86 years old rocking on my porch, what do I hope I will have accomplished?

Set your sail
A map, a compass, a knife, and a crew won't do much good on a boat that stays docked. It has to set sail. As Gordon MacDonald suggests in his new book, A Resilient Life: You Can Move Ahead No Matter What, "the greatest contributions God has for believers often come during the second half of life."

That means we've got to push off and get going, keeping our vision clear and our faith anchored in the One who's been waiting our entire lifetime—not just in midlife—to hear us sing,

Guide me, O Thou Great Jehovah,
Pilgrim through this barren land.
I am weak, but Thou art mighty;
Hold me with Thy powerful hand.
Bread of heaven, bread of heaven,
Feed me till I want no more;
Feed me till I want no more.
   —from the Welsh hymn by William Williams

Jo Kadlecek, 46, writes and lives with her 51-year-old husband on the Jersey Shore, though both are moving a little slower than they used to. Find out about their adventures at their website, www.lamppostmedia.net. Jo's novel, The Sound of My Voice, was released in May.

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