
Home > Today's Christian
> 2006
> March/April
O Brothers, Where Art Thou?
The absence of single men is emerging as one of the key trends in Christian dating. Here's the problem through the eyes of two expert observers—and some suggestions for fixing it.
By Camerin Courtney and Todd Hertz
 2 of 4

It's not raining men
Now, let me say I do know there are godly single men in our world. I'm well aware. I'm great friends with some of them and have dated a few others. And yes, there are certainly pockets where the gender split is 50/50 or even skewed to the male side. I even attended one such church during a recent business trip.
My contention is simply that on the whole there appear to be so many less single men in Christian circles than there are single women. My own experience has borne out this truth. Nearly all the church groups, Bible studies, singles groups, and Christian workplaces I've been a part of over the years have been populated by lots of single women and noticeably (and frustratingly) fewer single men. My current crop of single friends is mostly comprised of godly women.
I kid you not, when I was in InterVarsity Christian Fellowship at the secular university I attended years ago, one of our recurring prayer requests was for more men to join our community (for their benefit as well as for ours!).
Every time the company newsletter comes out at the Christian office where I work, there's a laundry list of new single female employees. In stark contrast, I could count the single men in our company practically on one hand—out of 150 workers!
I often joke with Todd, my coauthor, that because of his gender, he's got a buffet of dating/mate choices spread out before him. I, on the other hand, I lament with great drama, am starving in the desert.
"When I was in InterVarsity Christian Fellowship years ago, one of our recurring prayer requests was for more men to join our community—for their benefit as well as for ours!" —Camerin Courtney
Missing in action
Todd:
When Camerin first told me her theory that I faced a buffet of options and she was starving, I rolled my eyes. I thought she was feeling sorry for herself. I thought she was dramatizing. No way, I thought, it's the reverse. There aren't enough Christian women around!
But then I looked at the research. In 2000, the Barna Research Group found in a nationwide survey that 60 percent of adherents to Christianity are women. The survey also looked at the number of each gender whose beliefs identified them as born-again Christians. Based on the results, Barna estimates there are currently between 11 million and 13 million more born-again women than born-again men in the U.S.
But what's startling is not just the gender disparity among Christian adherents; it's also the difference between men who believe and those who are actually active in their belief. Although 36 percent of men in the Barna survey were identified as born-again believers, only 14 percent attend Sunday school, 13 percent belong to a small group, and 9 percent have held any leadership position in a church. Each category's percentages were substantially higher for women.
Browse More Today's Christian Home | People of Faith | Stories of Hope | Today's Culture Build Your Faith | Laughing Matters | Archives | Contact Us
 |
|
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
Try 3 Issues of Christianity Today Free!
 |
 |
|
 Subscribe to Christianity Today and get 3 free trial issues. No credit card required.
Please allow 4-6 weeks for delivery. Offer valid in U.S. only.
If you decide you want to keep Christianity Today coming, honor your invoice for just $19.95 and receive nine more issues, a full year in all. If not, simply write "cancel" across the invoice and return it. The three trial issues are yours to keep, regardless.
Give Christianity Today as a gift
Order a gift subscription!
|
|
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
|
 |
|  |
 |