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The Adoption Option
My search for answers to our struggle with infertility led to some surprising revelations about God's plan—especially how infertility and adoption played key roles in Bible history.
By Elliott J. Anderson
 1 of 4

I'm a guy who likes answers. I want them now, and I want them fast.
I don't know if some personalities are better suited to dealing with infertility than others, but I do know mine isn't one of them! I'm hyper. Driven. I'm impatient and I'm competitive. Infertility is a masterful opponent, however, and as our time spent trying to conceive a child approached a decade, it was beating me physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. Something had to change. I hate losing.
My wife, Angie, and I had discussed the idea of adoption for years, both prior to and right after our marriage. But now, when adoption seemed our only recourse, we made the subject off limits. It felt like an act of surrender rather than a choice. Like a consolation prize. Like second place.
As we balanced the delicate walk between grief and hope, I decided that I had to understand the Lord's heart regarding this subject. What did the Bible really teach us about infertility and adoption? How did God use it in the lives of His people? How was He using it in mine?
Sympathizing with Abraham
Jacob has always been my favorite Bible hero, so I knew where to start this process. I did some intensive research on the first three generations of Abraham to see how God had knit together barren couples with His call of the chosen people. This study softened my heart. It helped me grieve at a deeper level and prepared me for an amazing journey that was soon to be unveiled.
I sympathized with Abram and the way his confusion grew each time the Lord told him that he would be the father of a multitude of nations. He was to be fruitful beyond comprehension, and yet Sarai just did not conceive. As each month passed without pregnancy, they must have assumed that God was displeased with them, or at best was waiting for them to be worthy of His call. I empathized; Angie and I had battled this same insecurity and conditional reasoning.
After 10 additional years of waiting, complete with a name change for each spouse and a turn-of-the-century birthday for Abraham, then and only then did the Lord fulfill His commitment to this now elderly couple. Isn't it typical of God to wait until He, and He alone, can bring the result? That's the overriding message I received from Abraham and Sarah. And, except for the age differences, a somewhat similar occurrence played out in my own marriage as the Lord brought us four children in the next two years.
Growing patience and trust
The second couple was Abraham's only son, Isaac, and his wife, Rebekah. We know that the covenant promise to Abraham was in jeopardy if Isaac and Rebekah remained barren.
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