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Our six-year-old grandson Braden, who rarely missed Sunday school, was visiting us. Complaining that he had a slight stomach ache, his biblical training certainly showed when he admitted, "But I don't know if it's in my large or small testament."

—LaVeta Sparks
Tucson, Arizona

Our daughter Kathryn bought matching lavender W.W.J.D. (What Would Jesus Do) bracelets for herself and her three-year-old daughter, Cari, after explaining the significance of the letters.

When Cari's father, Terry, returned from a business trip, she ran to show him her new present.

"Oh, what a pretty bracelet," he said. "What are the letters?"

Cari's blue eyes sparkled with excitement as she began, "W … W … " before she got stuck.

But her scowl soon changed to a triumphant smile, as she said, "w w dot com."

—Esther Witteveen
Holland, Michigan

When my daughter Bettikaye was five, she rebelled against doing one of her chores. Her father told her, "You might as well get used to working. You'll have to do it all your life."

"Not when I get married," she said.

"How come?"

"Well, if brides have to work, what are all those bridesmaids for?"

—Peg Matthews
Lexington, South Carolina

My aunt and uncle had a missionary family visiting. When the missionary children were called in for dinner, their mother said, "Be sure to wash your hands." The little boy scowled and said, "Germs and Jesus. Germs and Jesus. That's all I hear, and I've never seen either one of them."

—Vesper Bauer
Audubon, Iowa

My granddaughter Barbara received a "B" in conduct on her report card with the reason noted—whispering.

On her next report card, Barbara proudly pointed out the "A" in conduct, bragging to her father, "I got my report card, and I've improved in my whispering."

—Thomas LaMance
Prewitt, New Mexico

Our three-year-old daughter, Shannon, came home from church one fall Sunday with a paper plate that had leaves glued on it. My husband asked, "What was the purpose of gluing the leaves on the plate?"

Expecting Shannon to talk about the season or God's care for creation, he was surprised at a more pragmatic response, "To make them stick!"

—Marsha Young
Anchorage, Alaska

In kindergarten, my son Cole had to have at least 20 books read to him in a month in order to earn a free pizza. One month we were scrambling to meet the quota. Then, we lost our official list.

By the time we found it, our puppy had already chewed and mangled the page. I slapped the last title on it and attached a note to his teacher—"This is a classic case of 'the dog ate my homework!'"

Cole's teacher had the last laugh. I didn't notice the last title I listed was Trouble with Pets.

—Kelly Long
Medicine Lodge, Kansas

It was a bad hair day. My hair-dresser and I had been talking, and before I knew it, I had the shortest haircut ever.

When I picked up Andy, my first grader, from school, he was visibly surprised. But neither of us mentioned it.

On our ride home, I tried to think of what hats I could wear. Andy remained quiet, but every now and then I caught him staring at me. Pulling into the driveway, he offered his sweet condolences: "Mom, I'd recognize you even if you were bald."

—Cheri Fallon
Wyomissing, Pennsylvania

For a while, my four-year-old daughter Jasmine's favorite pastime was singing and bowing. Asked if she was going to be a star someday, she said confidently, "Yes, and the moon, too!"

—Brenda Covert
Greer, South Carolina

Copyright © 1998 by the author or Christianity Today International/Today's Christian magazine (formerly Christian Reader).
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