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I Was a Witch
But all my occult practices never brought me peace.

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Witchcraft, telepathy, levitation, spirit channeling, ESP, and a host of other paranormal activities were all I knew from early childhood. While we attended church every Sunday and called ourselves Christians, my parents started espousing Hindu beliefs and New Age philosophies. Soon, choir camp was replaced with psychic camp, and séances, Ouija boards, crystals, and pendulums became the norm in our home. Every night around the dinner table, we discussed topics such as ghosts, poltergeists, and contact from the beyond. Yet as strange as it sounds, we still considered ourselves to be Christian.

Then, when I was 17, my mother's slow, agonizing battle with cancer ended. The void within me was too great to fill, so I found solace in my anger. To anesthetize my pain over my mom's death, I turned to black magic, voodoo, hexes, and curses. Since my future seemed so uncertain, I began reading Tarot cards to tell my fortune. I even took on a new appearance—I cut and dyed my light brown curls jet black. I wore white makeup, black lipstick, and black clothes. Eight holes pierced my ear—my new trademark.

My behavior changed as well. I quit high school and started hanging out downtown with all the other misfits and vagabonds. One of my best friends was a warlock named Stephen. Witchcraft became my haven, my identity, my lifestyle. Although my dad and I were close, he was too caught up in his grief to seem to notice the poor choices I was making. He later told me he was sorry he hadn't been more of an emotional support for me during the time my life started taking its downward spiral.

I considered myself a spiritual person. While I believed God is the Creator of all things and that Jesus Christ is his son, one important element was missing: reverence. I had no fear of God, no sense of accountability or responsibility to him. In my mind, hell didn't exist, which alleviated the consequences of evil.

As the years went by, I barely scraped out a living as a manicurist. I moved from place to place—Atlanta, Seattle, and finally Hollywood when I was 26 years old. With no money, no car, and no telephone, life was hard. The tiny room I rented on the Boulevard was hot and cockroach-infested. I stepped over used syringes and condoms each morning on my way to the bus stop. I didn't fill my father in on all these details because I didn't want him to worry. I persisted in romanticizing this colorful and sometimes dangerous lifestyle, but it was taking its toll.

Suffering from severe anorexia, my 100-pound, 5-foot-5-inch frame had its share of health issues. And with a weekly budget of fifty dollars, as the years passed, I wondered why the Universe wasn't taking better care of me. Surely the answer lay within the supernatural sphere of my mother's crystal ball, which my father gave me right after she died. Though it was quite large and expensive, the thought of selling it never crossed my mind, as it would inevitably become a family heirloom. Still, whenever I gazed into it, I received no word from the beyond. I sank deeper into poverty, and my health problems progressed.

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Related Topics
Anger, conversion, Irreverence, Joy, Lifestyle, New Age movement, Occult, Peace, Transformation, Witchcraft

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Displaying 1 - 3 of 19 comments.See all comments
Pat Posted: January 18, 2008 4:20 PM
Comment to 'RadWitch': I don't believe Kimberly threw the crystal ball away from fear. I believe it was because she didn't want anything in her life that would be a hindrance to her new life as a Christian. In Hebrews 12:1 we are told to throw off everything that hinders us. If the crystal ball could have caused her to return to her former life of sin, despite the fact that it was her mom's, she did the right thing.

Josephine Posted: January 07, 2008 8:19 AM
What an inspiring story of Transformation when we seek the truth as found in our Holy Scriptures. We don't need any item to represent our faith or future. The greatest sense of belonging comes in knowing that God loved us so that God gave his son, Jesus, as a ransome for our eternal life. Living life on this earth is but one phase of our journey - Eternal life is the never ending part. I thank God that you kept on seeking. It is written, "seek and you shall find - knock and the door will be open." Praise God for you truly have been redeemed!

Mayang L. Posted: January 06, 2008 12:58 AM
Glory to God! Hallelujah! I pray that your life will be a constant source of encouragement to people God will send your way. You have work to do, sister!

 








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