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Chances are, if you're not on a diet when you read this, you just were—or will be soon. According to a study published in the International Journal of Eating Disorders, on any given day, 64.5 million American women are on a diet and will spend billions on diet and diet-related products each year. For way too many of us, dieting is our lifestyle of choice as we constantly focus on how much we eat, how much we weigh, and how we look.
That's why Constance Rhodes, 31, a wife and mom of a toddler son, founded the faith-based organization Finding Balance in January 2001. Her passion is to counter the mistaken belief that the chronic dieting done by those who don't meet clinical criteria for more extreme eating disorders is normal and healthy. She knows firsthand it isn't—she lived much of her young-adult life as a chronic dieter obsessed with staying thin. Along with the publication of Life Inside the "Thin" Cage (Shaw Books), which provides a candid look into her disordered eating and subsequent journey toward change, Constance speaks frequently on the issue, maintains a website, and provides resources and referrals to help others find the hope and healing she's found. Here's what Constance had to share with TCW.
What do you mean by "thin cage?" It's that dark prison in your mind where everything's off-limits and everything's based on performance. I spent 12 years in it by dieting constantly even though I didn't need to lose weight. I existed on water and carefully planned meals every day, and never allowed myself to enjoy a piece of cake or a slice of pizza. I was so paranoid about gaining weight that I even limited myself to ten grams of fat daily. But instead of bringing me happiness, staying thin kept me from enjoying life.
For example, one Sunday our church held a spaghetti dinner, but I was so afraid of eating something I shouldn't that my husband and I skipped it. I desperately wanted friends in our new church, but I was too worried I would overeat if we attended.
Even though I was a Christian, I didn't trust God with this area of my life. I was afraid that if I relinquished control, I would gain weight. And I really didn't want that to happen; I equated thinness with happiness and success.
Overweight women may have trouble relating to a "thin cage." Is their struggle completely different? Not really. I suspect that many overweight women also struggle with an unhealthy relationship with food. Women at both ends of the spectrum feel as though weight and value are tied together in some way. So even if you're thin and everybody thinks you look great, you don't necessarily feel better about yourself.
Then why do we equate thinness with happiness? Everything in our culture promotes it. We see thin, attractive women in almost every commercial, television program, and movie. But if you look around, you realize not everyone looks like they do in Hollywood. Yet we're bombarded by these images every day.
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